Thanks, Ben, for your very fine post.
What I have found in recent years is that for four or five days each week, literally from about 7:30 a.m. until 11:30 p.m., I am occupied with something, be it family, work, work at home, housework, grocery shopping, cooking, eating, showering, or whatever. Literally, most of my days are packed. I almost never watch television. Actually one thing I do for relaxation is that I read and post here on this board and (lately) over at the zen board. I guess I could cut those things out. And on those two or three days when my schedule isn't packed, I have more time for meditation.
About a year ago, I had some physical symptoms due to lack of sleep. Over the years, I've learned that I need to be careful about shorting myself on sleep (and to listen to my doctor with regard to sleep). I need about 6.5 to 7 hours a night at this stage, and it's better if I get 7.5 once in a while too. Otherwise, I become ill.
What I have learned about meditation is that for me personally, it's just better if I don't worry about it or beat myself up about it. You're correct that with regular meditation practice, a person needs less sleep, and I believe I'll work into that again. One great thing I have going in my favor is a very supportive spouse who lately has prompted me to take time to sit. She even bought a nice, top-notch cushion for me as a surprise. Obviously, she's trying to tell me something. But she also knows that my character is to push myself, sometimes too hard. She drives me nuts sometimes, but she keeps me sane, if you know what I mean.
One thing you wrote, Ben really resonates with me:
... there appears to be little correlation between the perceived quality of a sit and the benefit we derive out of it.
I'd take it even a step further: After those mindblowing-type sits that afterward make you think, holy crap, this really works (you know what I mean probably better than I do), it actually seems to harm practice if I think too much about that sit or aim for exactly the same thing again. These things come and go. If I have a tedious, aching sit distracted by a proliferation of thoughts right up till the end, I figure I've done my job. I sat. Then I take it (whatever it is) off the cushion and into the rest of life. Hopefully with stronger metta.
Two hours a day every day, yes, I'll get there again. This may not be quite the season for me. But seasons can change quickly. Meanwhile, I very much appreciate the encouragement and inspiration that I very often find here.
Metta