SDC wrote: ↑Thu Jun 20, 2019 6:04 pm
Interestingly enough, such a teacher usually has little desire if any for praise. Think about it, you wouldn't need a pat on the back for something you *know* is true.
I think there's something here that middle-class Americans and people from a proletariat background (or, generally, people from "socialist" countries) tend to have difficulty understanding. Namely, there appears to be particular kind of "expertise pride" or "expertise honor". It's when people who have expertise in a particular field will not discuss it with just anyone or in just any way; instead, they expect a measure of respect for their expertise, by default. I've seen this in doctors, hair dressers, gardeners, car mechanics, teachers, musicians ... and, of course, religous/spiritual people. It's like they have a boundary and they demand respect for their profession(alism), and they will not discuss it, at least not with someone who doesn't also have expertise in that field. That, "Who do you think you are to think you can talk about this with me?!"
To an extent, I can understand that -- maybe they are just bored, or they understand how much they would need to explain to the other person in order to answer their question, and they just don't feel like it. But sometimes, they really seem to have an air of "It's beneath my dignity to discuss my expertise with this person" and they seem to expect that the other person should understand that.
Or, they simply expect to be paid for giving their professional opinion.
To give a vivid example: In college, I once attended a lecture given by the then most relevant linguist in our country. At the end, the professor who hosted the lecture invited students to ask questions. She gave us about 2 seconds to raise our hands, and then she said, "Oh, no questions? The authority is too big!"
I've seen the same thing in regular lectures. We were not actually supposed to ask the professor any questions about the study matter.
In many social settings, status awareness and knowing one's place take precedence over the study matter and everything else. In my experience, there appears to be quite a bit of that in Buddhism as well. Personally, I think many of my problems with Buddhists and Buddhism have been due to not taking this into consideration, and instead I approached conversations as if they were just discussions about the study matter at hand.
If you can't build with them, don't chill with them.