Can't trust anybody.

[catmoon]

Is my compassion like the roar of a lion or a tender meow?

-A

Dunno, but it's subtle like a falling bowling ball to the head.

[Annapurna]

Different strokes for different blokes.

Meanwhile, Individual has moved on to another topic.

[Ben]

Meanwhile, Individual has moved on to another topic.

Perhaps we should too.
Kind regards

Ben

[LauraJ]

Hi Individual,

I don't judge people who use weed or anything else, I never would. But I'm glad for you, to hear that right now you've given it up. Because without the tiniest shred of hesitation, I can say that it attracts trouble in countless ways (including troubling weed-smoking-friendships).

Much metta to you
Laura

[Dan74]

Sounds like you've learnt to stand up for yourself just fine!

Be well, friend.

_/|\_

PS I don't think there is anyone here who hasn't in one way or another let him or herself down for most of their lives at least. If you are conscious of the fact, this is a huge bonus already! Plus you have the Dhamma. Now all that's needed is resolve and stamina to stick with it.

[BlackBird]

Since this topic is making a resurgence

I smoked weed, amongst other things for years, and all I got was a chronic spotlight effect. I'm really glad to have found the Dhamma, and turned my life around actually, I was going down a bad path.

Sometimes I guess I take the Triple Gem for granted. It's worth more than anything you can buy on this planet, and it's offered for free. The word 'gem' doesn't really do it justice, it's a treasure incomparable. So when we look at it in this light, we shouldn't be upset about having to do things we don't want, or not getting our own way, because we always have the Buddha, Dhamma and Sangha, which is so rare in Samsara, such a freak occurrence. We're the fortunate lot, indeed.

metta
Jack

[Clueless Git]

I've been lied to, robbed, and betrayed many time ..!

Only once we have been robbed of our ability to trust have we been robbed of owt of any real importance matey?

From memory ...

"He robbed me, he beat me, he threw me down! Trouble will follow he who harbours such thoughts as surely as the wheel follows the Ox that pulls the cart ..."

It's a toughie matey. A dirty world fights a constant war of attrition against those who wish to be 'clean'?

Il nisi Ilegitimi carborundum (let not the b'stards grind you down).

[Mothra]

I've been lied to, robbed, and betrayed many time ..!

"He robbed me, he beat me, he threw me down! Trouble will follow he who harbours such thoughts as surely as the wheel follows the Ox that pulls the cart ..."

It's amazing how perfectly this situation seems to fit the very beginning of the Dhammapada:

3. "He abused me, he struck me, he overpowered me, he robbed me." Those who harbor such thoughts do not still their hatred.

4. "He abused me, he struck me, he overpowered me, he robbed me." Those who do not harbor such thoughts still their hatred.

5. Hatred is never appeased by hatred in this world. By non-hatred alone is hatred appeased. This is a law eternal.

6. There are those who do not realize that one day we all must die. But those who do realize this settle their quarrels.

7. Just as a storm throws down a weak tree, so does Mara overpower the man who lives for the pursuit of pleasures, who is uncontrolled in his senses, immoderate in eating, indolent, and dissipated. 1

8. Just as a storm cannot prevail against a rocky mountain, so Mara can never overpower the man who lives meditating on the impurities, who is controlled in his senses, moderate in eating, and filled with faith and earnest effort. 2

9. Whoever being depraved, devoid of self-control and truthfulness, should don the monk's yellow robe, he surely is not worthy of the robe.

10. But whoever is purged of depravity, well-established in virtues and filled with self-control and truthfulness, he indeed is worthy of the yellow robe.

[Anders]

Oh, what a bunch of spoil-sports.

qft. Badgering people into being moral rarely works for anyone.

Sorry to say, but the stench of being saved reeks a bit in this thread. I'm pretty sure Individual already knows smoking weed is not an ideal virtue of a Buddhist practitioner, but that's really not the topic here.

At any rate, it sounds like you have a lot of practise picking bad friends and are now picking up the habit of figuring out how worthwhile that is. Good for you, indi.

[Sanghamitta]

Oh, what a bunch of spoil-sports.

qft. Badgering people into being moral rarely works for anyone.

Sorry to say, but the stench of being saved reeks a bit in this thread. I'm pretty sure Individual already knows smoking weed is not an ideal virtue of a Buddhist practitioner, but that's really not the topic here.

At any rate, it sounds like you have a lot of practise picking bad friends and are now picking up the habit of figuring out how worthwhile that is. Good for you, indi.

Sorry to contradict you, but fwiw there is ample evidence if you cross refer, that Individual would not agree that smoking weed is not an ideal virtue of a Buddhist practitioner. He thinks it is a non issue. Therefore the fact the fact that he was threatening violence because his store of marijuana was stolen is likewise a non issue in terms of the Dhamma in his view. A number of people were concerned enough to point out that his unhappiness was in part directly a consequence with his not making the connection between that unhappiness and a particular life style. I think a laizzes faire response to this would be adhammic.

[Annapurna]

Badgering people into being moral rarely works for anyone.

Sorry to say, but the stench of being saved reeks a bit in this thread. I'm pretty sure Individual already knows smoking weed is not an ideal virtue of a Buddhist practitioner, but that's really not the topic here.

At any rate, it sounds like you have a lot of practise picking bad friends and are now picking up the habit of figuring out how worthwhile that is. Good for you, indi.

Sorry to contradict you, but fwiw there is ample evidence if you cross refer, that Individual would not agree that smoking weed is not an ideal virtue of a Buddhist practitioner. He thinks it is a non issue. Therefore the fact the fact that he was threatening violence because his store of marijuana was stolen is likewise a non issue in terms of the Dhamma in his view. A number of people were concerned enough to point out that his unhappiness was in part directly a consequence with his not making the connection between that unhappiness and a particular life style. I think a laizzes faire response to this would be adhammic.

I agree with Sanghamitta here.

And how can Indi pick better friends in that scene?

A man who persists in stalking game in a place where there is none may wait forever without finding any.

I think people who replied to Indi here really care, if they didn't they wouldn't bother to .

They doing it for him, not for themselves, because they can anticipate only too well he will not be pleased.

[Anders]

You don't do people a favor when you tell them what they want to hear, but when you tell them the truth.

I don't think that's doing people a favor. You tell people the truth they are capable of listening to.

[Annapurna]

Aolopgies Anders, I was still editing, becuase I saw it was the first post on a new page, and so makes it hard for people to see what I'm replying to. I copied and pasted that post, and somehow deleted mine.

I would rather have you replying to what i wrote now, and especially to what Sanghamitta wrote cause i#m basically sopporting that.

[Sanghamitta]

You don't do people a favor when you tell them what they want to hear, but when you tell them the truth.

I don't think that's doing people a favor. You tell people the truth they are capable of listening to.

On this thread and others Individual invited a response to what he was saying. He got a response which imo was compassionate and honest.

[Sanghamitta]

what is better mindfulness or lack of mindfulness?
discipline or lack of discipline?
wholesomeness or lack of wholesomeness?[/quote]
Negative self-judgments are not useful. It seems more prudent to try to enjoy life and not be overly concerned with discipline or morality.[/quote]
Likewise if one posts views like the above on a Theravadin site, a school of Buddhism which emphasises morality strongly as a prerequisite of practice, then one will get a response which reflects that fact. These responses are acts of compassion.