Metta practice

General discussion of issues related to Theravada Meditation, e.g. meditation postures, developing a regular sitting practice, skillfully relating to difficulties and hindrances, etc.
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mike1127
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Joined: Thu Nov 12, 2009 8:54 am

Metta practice

Post by mike1127 »

Hello, I am not completely new to Buddhism but new to this forum. I have attended several retreats at Spirit Rock Meditation Center. I believe they are close to Theravadan, although the teachers (Jack Kornfield, Sylvia Boorstein, Joseph Goldstein, and so on) have adapted the teachings for the west.

I have been practicing metta meditation, and I just wanted to share this image I use when I get to the part about sending metta to my "enemy" (or as we might say, "difficult person.") So I usually start by having a good sense of metta for myself, then a neutral person. Then I have a difficult person in mind. I imagine two buttons in front of me. Pushing one causes harm to my difficult person, and pushing the other makes him a little happier than he is now. Neither button causes any effect to me, not directly. I reflect on the felt sense associated with pushing each button. I ask myself, "What would I choose?" I find that usually I really want to press the button that makes him happier. I start to realize it feels good psychologically, and of course it does me no harm. It does me no harm to wish happiness to another. I think the difficulty we sometimes have in wishing happiness for someone we dislike or envy is that we imagine it takes something away from us. But I just imagine those two buttons, and reflect on how pushing the button that makes him happier really has no negative side-effect. That's all it does. Make him happier.

Also, many teachers I've had mentioned that wishing happiness to your enemies makes a lot of sense, because if they were truly happy, they probably wouldn't be your enemy any more.
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Ben
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Re: Metta practice

Post by Ben »

Hi Mike
Nice post!
Welcome to Dhamma Wheel!
metta

Ben
“No lists of things to be done. The day providential to itself. The hour. There is no later. This is later. All things of grace and beauty such that one holds them to one's heart have a common provenance in pain. Their birth in grief and ashes.”
- Cormac McCarthy, The Road

Learn this from the waters:
in mountain clefts and chasms,
loud gush the streamlets,
but great rivers flow silently.
- Sutta Nipata 3.725

Compassionate Hands Foundation (Buddhist aid in Myanmar) • Buddhist Global ReliefUNHCR

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retrofuturist
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Re: Metta practice

Post by retrofuturist »

Greetings Mike,

Thanks for sharing your metta technique... it's actually quite touching - I like it.

Welcome to Dhamma Wheel, by the way.

:heart:

Metta,
Retro. :)
"Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things."
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Guy
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Re: Metta practice

Post by Guy »

:goodpost: Welcome to the forum!
Four types of letting go:

1) Giving; expecting nothing back in return
2) Throwing things away
3) Contentment; wanting to be here, not wanting to be anywhere else
4) "Teflon Mind"; having a mind which doesn't accumulate things

- Ajahn Brahm
PeterB
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Re: Metta practice

Post by PeterB »

:anjali:
mike1127
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Re: Metta practice

Post by mike1127 »

Thanks for the warm welcome, everyone. Peace.
salaatti
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Re: Metta practice

Post by salaatti »

I would like to send metta to an enemy or a difficult person, but I really don't know any! What should I do?
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Ben
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Re: Metta practice

Post by Ben »

Hi salaatti

No problem. Just extend metta to all living beings. There are several techniquess for practicing metta.

Metta: The Philosophy and Practice of Universal Love: http://www.accesstoinsight.org/lib/auth ... el365.html" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
kind regards

Ben
“No lists of things to be done. The day providential to itself. The hour. There is no later. This is later. All things of grace and beauty such that one holds them to one's heart have a common provenance in pain. Their birth in grief and ashes.”
- Cormac McCarthy, The Road

Learn this from the waters:
in mountain clefts and chasms,
loud gush the streamlets,
but great rivers flow silently.
- Sutta Nipata 3.725

Compassionate Hands Foundation (Buddhist aid in Myanmar) • Buddhist Global ReliefUNHCR

e: [email protected]..
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Khalil Bodhi
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Re: Metta practice

Post by Khalil Bodhi »

Ben,

Excellent link! Sadhu! Sadhu! Sadhu! :anjali:
To avoid all evil, to cultivate good, and to cleanse one's mind — this is the teaching of the Buddhas.
-Dhp. 183

The Stoic Buddhist: https://www.quora.com/q/dwxmcndlgmobmeu ... pOR2p0uAdH
My Practice Blog:
http://khalilbodhi.wordpress.com
Laurens
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Re: Metta practice

Post by Laurens »

Thank you for sharing that, I could feel it working just from reading that without even being at the cushion! I makes a lot of sense.

:namaste:
"If only it were all so simple! If only there were evil people somewhere insidiously committing evil deeds, and it were necessary only to separate them from the rest of us and destroy them. But the line dividing good and evil cuts through the heart of every human being. And who is willing to destroy a piece of his own heart?"

Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn
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