it seems I'm writing this message the second time today. The first time it didn't get posted.
You are of course right that fighting my sex drive, trying to eradicate it is extreme and would only make the suffering worse. Thank you for reminding me to just be mindful of my feelings. I wrote my first post shortly after I got overwhelmed by them.
I don't think, however, that remaining celibate till the end of year is extreme. It is a period short enough to withstand it and long enough to see if it brings any effects. And having a set time period, then evaluating the outcome is much easier for me than doing it one day at a time. I guess that's because I'm a very goal-oriented person.
I have restored my daily sittings, thank you for advising that. This time, however, I'm going to focus more on samadhi and metta. I feel that metta meditation might be crucial for me since I've been somewhat neglecting it in the past and I've developed a lot of anger due to my involuntary celibacy. I've bought Bhante G.'s 'Beyond Mindfulness in Plain English' and I'm going to do jhana-oriented meditation. And off the cushion I will focus on mindfulness and metta. I don't think asubha would be the right way for me at this moment - while it might lower my sex drive, I clearly need to get my mindfulness stronger and this is a great opportunityto to train. Thank you for mentioning it, though. I will keep it in my mind in case I decide to try it in the future.
Unfortunately, loving relationship is not an option for me, at least in foreseeable future.
Bubba, good for you! To me, Buddhism is all about happines, and if you are happy that's great! Too bad not all of us can say that
Of course sex is not half of what it's cracked up to be but between the hormones raging and the pop culture brainwashing, you are not going to really believe me.
Oh, I do believe you. That's what I've been suspecting for a long time. My body, though, has a totally different opinion on the subject matter
Thank you once again to everyone who contributed in this topic and thank you for your metta.