Some of my faves...
No pirate shall attend a movie with less than an Arrrr rating.
If circumstances demand a career change, a move into real estate brokerage or tax collection shall be considered a lateral move and said individual may keep their pirate status.
No pirate shall ever sit on a toilet seat, for any reason.
Pirate Law: You can't spell pirate, without "irate". There's a reason for that, so don't even try.
No pirate will ever, ever raise his pinky when drinking any sort of beverage.
Under no circumstances does a pirate speak with a Ninja, unless he first decapitates that Ninja and uses his head like a sock puppet.
“No lists of things to be done. The day providential to itself. The hour. There is no later. This is later. All things of grace and beauty such that one holds them to one's heart have a common provenance in pain. Their birth in grief and ashes.”
- Cormac McCarthy, The Road
Learn this from the waters:
in mountain clefts and chasms,
loud gush the streamlets,
but great rivers flow silently.
- Sutta Nipata 3.725Compassionate Hands Foundation
(Buddhist aid in Myanmar) • Buddhist Global Relief