state of mind
first let me say that may be there is a better term than 'mind state' for what i'm talking about. so i describe what do i think and it will be helpful for me to open it, but please as much as possible use clear, simple description that i could understand.
1-peoples natural mind state is varying form calm to agitated and concentrated to scattered and etc. but my feeling about this, is like that there is a fundamental KNOWING that these states are running over them, let me say there is an operating system ( KNOWING ) that a program ( happy , sad, calm...) run over it.
what do i say here, is i feel this operating system, this KNOWING MIND, is very dominant, when i become mindful, usually the first thing that fills the mind landscape is KNOWING, i dont know WHAT KNOWING? but just KNOWING, being alive,....
so in this situation breathing is very non important matter against this feeling of KNOWING, this being alive. KNOWING is more strong and undeniable. for me cultivating absorption is like forgetting this KNOWING, this being alive, although that i can not get absorb but i have such a feeling about that.
maybe this is a feeling that everybody has but it becomes too big in me, and acts as an obstacle....
i hope that someone understand and could give me some input to work, how theravada point to this? what is the practical approach to this feeling?