How to recover after heartbreak

Balancing family life and the Dhamma, in pursuit of a happy lay life.
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Bundokji
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Re: How to recover after heartbreak

Post by Bundokji » Wed Nov 20, 2019 11:52 am

If i were you, i would have thought more seriously about arranged marriage. Its way less risky than having a relationship through tender, and its not too late if you are worry about old age.
And the Blessed One addressed the bhikkhus, saying: "Behold now, bhikkhus, I exhort you: All compounded things are subject to vanish. Strive with earnestness!"

This was the last word of the Tathagata.

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No_Mind
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Location: India

Re: How to recover after heartbreak

Post by No_Mind » Wed Nov 20, 2019 12:18 pm

Bundokji wrote:
Wed Nov 20, 2019 11:52 am
If i were you, i would have thought more seriously about arranged marriage. Its way less risky than having a relationship through tender, and its not too late if you are worry about old age.
Thank you for your response.

Indian arranged marriage is a process of sieving through possible matches. Primarily based on caste and income in case of the guy/dowry in case of the girl.

I am not a believer in it. Never was. And it is for those less than 30 or at most 30.

:namaste:
"The struggle itself toward the heights is enough to fill a man's heart. One must imagine Sisyphus happy.”― Albert Camus

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Bundokji
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Re: How to recover after heartbreak

Post by Bundokji » Wed Nov 20, 2019 12:38 pm

No_Mind wrote:
Wed Nov 20, 2019 12:18 pm
Thank you for your response.

Indian arranged marriage is a process of sieving through possible matches. Primarily based on caste and income in case of the guy/dowry in case of the girl.

I am not a believer in it. Never was. And it is for those less than 30 or at most 30.

:namaste:
I find it way more successful than later western ideals of having a relationship before marriage. Since people exaggerate the importance of having a relationship and knowing/loving each other before marriage divorce rates began to skyrocket.
And the Blessed One addressed the bhikkhus, saying: "Behold now, bhikkhus, I exhort you: All compounded things are subject to vanish. Strive with earnestness!"

This was the last word of the Tathagata.

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Dhammanando
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Location: Jaroen Dhamma Cave, Mae Wang Huai Rin, Lamphun

Re: How to recover after heartbreak

Post by Dhammanando » Wed Nov 20, 2019 2:14 pm

Bundokji wrote:
Wed Nov 20, 2019 12:38 pm
I find it way more successful than later western ideals of having a relationship before marriage. Since people exaggerate the importance of having a relationship and knowing/loving each other before marriage divorce rates began to skyrocket.
I don't think it started with that. Divorce in Britain, for example, started skyrocketing just as soon as it became easy to obtain. And this was at a time when unmarried cohabiting relationships were rather exceptional, widely disapproved and still commonly referred to as "living in sin".
“Keep to your own pastures, bhikkhus, walk in the haunts where your fathers roamed.
If ye thus walk in them, Māra will find no lodgement, Māra will find no foothold.”
— Cakkavattisīhanāda Sutta

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Bundokji
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Re: How to recover after heartbreak

Post by Bundokji » Wed Nov 20, 2019 3:23 pm

Dhammanando wrote:
Wed Nov 20, 2019 2:14 pm
I don't think it started with that. Divorce in Britain, for example, started skyrocketing just as soon as it became easy to obtain. And this was at a time when unmarried cohabiting relationships were rather exceptional, widely disapproved and still commonly referred to as "living in sin".
Thanks Bhante,

In my mind, making divorce easy to obtain is similar to premarital relationships in the sense that the law (whether social or civil) allowed more room for individual preferences and choice.
And the Blessed One addressed the bhikkhus, saying: "Behold now, bhikkhus, I exhort you: All compounded things are subject to vanish. Strive with earnestness!"

This was the last word of the Tathagata.

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