how to meet buddhist singles

Balancing family life and the Dhamma, in pursuit of a happy lay life.
User avatar
Sabbe_Dhamma_Anatta
Posts: 664
Joined: Sun Jan 20, 2019 5:06 pm

Re: how to meet buddhist singles

Post by Sabbe_Dhamma_Anatta » Sun Jul 21, 2019 4:51 am

binocular wrote:
Wed Nov 08, 2017 6:48 pm
Singles, shingles ...
:lol:
🅢🅐🅑🅑🅔 🅓🅗🅐🅜🅜🅐 🅐🅝🅐🅣🅣🅐
  • "the one thing all the mistaken views have in common is the assump­tion that the self exists" ~ DN1
  • "It is an entirely and perfectly foolish idea" ~ MN22
  • The No-self doctrine is found only in the teaching of the Buddha.
  • No-self (anatta) means that there is no permanent, unchanging entity in anything animate or inanimate. ~ SN22.59

User avatar
Sabbe_Dhamma_Anatta
Posts: 664
Joined: Sun Jan 20, 2019 5:06 pm

Re: how to meet buddhist singles

Post by Sabbe_Dhamma_Anatta » Sun Jul 21, 2019 4:54 am

dharmacorps wrote:
Thu Nov 09, 2017 12:55 am
I don't see anything wrong with match.com even. Its got a ton of people on there, I am sure you can specify your religious interests there. I met my wife there :)
Congrats!
🅢🅐🅑🅑🅔 🅓🅗🅐🅜🅜🅐 🅐🅝🅐🅣🅣🅐
  • "the one thing all the mistaken views have in common is the assump­tion that the self exists" ~ DN1
  • "It is an entirely and perfectly foolish idea" ~ MN22
  • The No-self doctrine is found only in the teaching of the Buddha.
  • No-self (anatta) means that there is no permanent, unchanging entity in anything animate or inanimate. ~ SN22.59

User avatar
manas
Posts: 2563
Joined: Thu Jul 22, 2010 3:04 am
Location: Melbourne, Australia

Re: how to meet buddhist singles

Post by manas » Fri Aug 30, 2019 3:51 am

ryanM wrote:
Thu Nov 09, 2017 9:31 pm
Sovatthika wrote:
Mon Nov 06, 2017 10:58 pm
i don't know what i could have in common enough with any puthujjanas
Kindness?
:goodpost:
Last edited by manas on Fri Aug 30, 2019 4:02 am, edited 1 time in total.
Like a merchant with a small
but well-laden caravan
–a dangerous road,

like a person who loves life
–a poison,

one should avoid
–evil deeds.

(Dhammapada 123)


User avatar
manas
Posts: 2563
Joined: Thu Jul 22, 2010 3:04 am
Location: Melbourne, Australia

Re: how to meet buddhist singles

Post by manas » Fri Aug 30, 2019 3:57 am

manas wrote:
Tue Jan 02, 2018 6:29 pm
The desire for a girlfriend comes up from time to time, but then I recollect how essentially flawed romantic relationships are, and I get put off. I've suffered enough already, I think.
Edited version: "The desire for a girlfriend comes up from time to time, but then I recollect how essentially flawed my romantic relationships have been, and I get put off. I've suffered enough already, I think."

Just to be clear. My experience isn't everyone else's.
Like a merchant with a small
but well-laden caravan
–a dangerous road,

like a person who loves life
–a poison,

one should avoid
–evil deeds.

(Dhammapada 123)


SarathW
Posts: 12020
Joined: Mon Sep 10, 2012 2:49 am

Re: how to meet buddhist singles

Post by SarathW » Fri Aug 30, 2019 4:05 am

Hi Manas
This is what called contemplation on Asvada and Adinava. (gratification and draw backs)
What you need to add is Nissarana (scape)
“As the lamp consumes oil, the path realises Nibbana”

User avatar
manas
Posts: 2563
Joined: Thu Jul 22, 2010 3:04 am
Location: Melbourne, Australia

Re: how to meet buddhist singles

Post by manas » Fri Aug 30, 2019 4:20 am

SarathW wrote:
Fri Aug 30, 2019 4:05 am
Hi Manas
This is what called contemplation on Asvada and Adinava. (gratification and draw backs)
What you need to add is Nissarana (scape)
Perhaps. But it might not be my kamma to escape it in this lifetime, when there is so much unresolved energy regarding women, in my psyche. Maybe I can, maybe not. But I was hurt pretty badly by a woman in my formative years; so it's hard to know, whether my wish to just be done with it all, is from true disenchantment, or from a wish to 'escape' the difficulty of having to confront how the hurt and pain caused by that early betrayal, might be the underlying, subconscious motivation for a wish to just fly off into the realm of non-sensual peace, which I so often (think) I wish to do.

I'm going to spell it out for clarity: I was sexually 'interfered with' by a woman I should have been able to trust, while I was a young teen. I think I might need to actually 'fix it with women' first, before contemplating long-term celibacy, else I might actually be left with a lot of underlying hurt deep in my psyche, that still needs resolution & healing. Perhaps the only way to heal it, is to have a relationship that is healthy, with a woman I can trust, where the ghost of that early betrayal doesn't intrude and spoil everything, from choice of partner, to being able to be both sexual and loving at the same time, and without that triggering memories of the original abuse by someone who shouldn't have been sexual with me. There, now you all know.

The abuse fractured me, in some way. I've come a long way to healing. but i don't think I'm done yet. This is why it's really important to never sexually interfere with children. It can do a lot of long-term damage.

ok, :focus: I guess.
Last edited by manas on Fri Aug 30, 2019 4:49 am, edited 1 time in total.
Like a merchant with a small
but well-laden caravan
–a dangerous road,

like a person who loves life
–a poison,

one should avoid
–evil deeds.

(Dhammapada 123)


SarathW
Posts: 12020
Joined: Mon Sep 10, 2012 2:49 am

Re: how to meet buddhist singles

Post by SarathW » Fri Aug 30, 2019 4:46 am

But it might not be my kamma to escape it in this lifetime, when there is so much unresolved energy regarding women, in my psyche.
You have to worry about this only when you are heading for Anagami.
What you need now is only the right view hence eliminating self view. (Sakkaya Dithi)
Sotapanna still enjoys the sensible sensual pleasures.
“As the lamp consumes oil, the path realises Nibbana”

User avatar
manas
Posts: 2563
Joined: Thu Jul 22, 2010 3:04 am
Location: Melbourne, Australia

Re: how to meet buddhist singles

Post by manas » Fri Aug 30, 2019 4:51 am

SarathW wrote:
Fri Aug 30, 2019 4:46 am
But it might not be my kamma to escape it in this lifetime, when there is so much unresolved energy regarding women, in my psyche.
You have to worry about this only when you are heading for Anagami.
What you need now is only the right view hence eliminating self view. (Sakkaya Dithi)
Sotapanna still enjoys the sensible sensual pleasures.
Thanks, Sarath. I need to let go of this subject now. Perhaps another time.
:anjali:
Like a merchant with a small
but well-laden caravan
–a dangerous road,

like a person who loves life
–a poison,

one should avoid
–evil deeds.

(Dhammapada 123)


User avatar
Bhikkhu Pesala
Posts: 3839
Joined: Thu Jan 29, 2009 8:17 pm

Re: how to meet buddhist singles

Post by Bhikkhu Pesala » Fri Aug 30, 2019 5:44 am

You can find lots of Buddhist singles in the Book of Ones.

Alternatively, visit any Buddhist monastery. You will find lots of committed Buddhist singles there. Meeting them may lead to something unexpected.
BlogPāli FontsIn This Very LifeBuddhist ChroniclesSoftware (Upasampadā: 24th June, 1979)

User avatar
retrofuturist
Site Admin
Posts: 21530
Joined: Tue Dec 30, 2008 9:52 pm
Location: Melbourne, Australia
Contact:

Re: how to meet buddhist singles

Post by retrofuturist » Fri Aug 30, 2019 5:54 am

Classic Pesala. 8-)

Metta,
Paul. :)
"The uprooting of identity is seen by the noble ones as pleasurable; but this contradicts what the whole world sees." (Snp 3.12)

"It is natural that one who knows and sees things as they really are is disenchanted and dispassionate." (AN 10.2)

“Truth does not change according to our ability to stomach it.” (Flannery O'Connor)

SarathW
Posts: 12020
Joined: Mon Sep 10, 2012 2:49 am

Re: how to meet buddhist singles

Post by SarathW » Fri Aug 30, 2019 7:19 am

You will find lots of committed Buddhist singles there.
Perhaps you can use a Sutta question as an icebreaker!
But make sure s/he is not an Anagami. You don't want to waste your time.
“As the lamp consumes oil, the path realises Nibbana”

Post Reply

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 6 guests