I need your feedback (on my words).

Exploring Theravāda's connections to other paths. What can we learn from other traditions, religions and philosophies?
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nobody12345
Posts: 196
Joined: Mon Nov 22, 2010 4:05 am

I need your feedback (on my words).

Post by nobody12345 » Mon Dec 29, 2014 8:17 pm

I need your feedback on whether or not my writing is acceptable in terms of 'right speech.'
I recently wrote a formal negative review for the first time.
The content of the review has 'unkind' words but the content itself is 100% true (so it is not a false speech, at least.).
Basically, a Reiki practitioner ripped off several hundreds dollars from me in a totally unethical manner.
So I reported it on Yelp as a review with all the accurate timeline and events in a sequential order.
According to my understanding, if a speech is beneficial to someone, then it is OK to be straightforward and not using pleasant words to the ear.
My rationale is, although this review casts a negative light on the Reiki practitioner, it can save others from getting ripped off in a similar manner.
But I'm still not 100% comfortable to leave a formal negative review under my belt.
Following URL is my review.
Could you read the review and share your insight on the issue?
http://www.yelp.com/user_details?userid ... pbNXdhHSRQ" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
Thank you very much.

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Bhikkhu Pesala
Posts: 3704
Joined: Thu Jan 29, 2009 8:17 pm

Re: I need your feedback (on my words).

Post by Bhikkhu Pesala » Mon Dec 29, 2014 10:31 pm

What makes any kamma unwholesome is the mental states associated with it. If there is anger or ill-will, then it's unwholesome (akusala).

However, if it's done with the intention to protect others from loss or danger, or to admonish someone to bring about spiritual improvements in them, without any ill-will, then it can be wholesome.

Blaming Individuals Directly
Venerable Ledi Sayādaw wrote:In the matter of blaming an individual directly, there are two ways: speaking directly to the person concerned, or speaking indirectly. Such blame or accusation, whether direct or indirect, brings fault to oneself if one has the intention to harm or attack others. One therefore obtains demerit in either case. So in criticising or blaming, one must avoid slander and other harmful speech, such as disparaging others and praising oneself. If the mind is free from anger, malice, jealousy, and divisiveness, and if the criticism is based on mutual benefits, one can blame others. In making remarks, oneself and others should be treated impartially. Honest criticism must be made within these guidelines.

If these factors are present in one’s criticism of others, one is free from fault and evil. Moreover, one is following the instruction of the Buddha which says: “He praises the praiseworthy. He blames the blameworthy.” So it is commendable if the good factors are present in the mind and if the facts are correct.
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nobody12345
Posts: 196
Joined: Mon Nov 22, 2010 4:05 am

Re: I need your feedback (on my words).

Post by nobody12345 » Tue Jan 06, 2015 4:43 am

Thank you Bhante for your answer.
I have to be honest on my mental status.
My mental status was more inclined to anger rather than caring for the benefits of other customers.
I think I was just very upset that someone could actually cancelled a formal business appointment multiple times and then refused to refund.
I cannot bring any Metta to that person.
This painfully reminds me that I'm SO not there since I am shaken by the gain and the loss of daily life.
As a layman, I do my best to maintain a certain standard but I cannot just let someone steal the money from me or rip me off in an unethical or criminal manner.
Anyway, thanks again for your answer Bhante.
I will work on my skill to handle this type of situations (although this kind of situation is very rare.).

Bhikkhu Pesala wrote:What makes any kamma unwholesome is the mental states associated with it. If there is anger or ill-will, then it's unwholesome (akusala).
However, if it's done with the intention to protect others from loss or danger, or to admonish someone to bring about spiritual improvements in them, without any ill-will, then it can be wholesome.

Blaming Individuals Directly
Venerable Ledi Sayādaw wrote:In the matter of blaming an individual directly, there are two ways: speaking directly to the person concerned, or speaking indirectly. Such blame or accusation, whether direct or indirect, brings fault to oneself if one has the intention to harm or attack others. One therefore obtains demerit in either case. So in criticising or blaming, one must avoid slander and other harmful speech, such as disparaging others and praising oneself. If the mind is free from anger, malice, jealousy, and divisiveness, and if the criticism is based on mutual benefits, one can blame others. In making remarks, oneself and others should be treated impartially. Honest criticism must be made within these guidelines.

If these factors are present in one’s criticism of others, one is free from fault and evil. Moreover, one is following the instruction of the Buddha which says: “He praises the praiseworthy. He blames the blameworthy.” So it is commendable if the good factors are present in the mind and if the facts are correct.

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