You sound bored.
You sound as if you are doing a Home retreat because you think it's what you should do, rather than doing it because you feel dedicated and want to.
To you it's an obligation which has turned into an ordeal.
If this is true, or even close to the truth, your Motivation is unskilful and you should suspend the activity.
A retreat is something you practise with dedication and sincerity.
If you 'look forward' to your time spent in Meditation as a stumbling block, or a problematic activity, then your heart will not be in it. On the contrary, you will dread it, and the situation will get worse, not better.
You will not be punished FOR
your 'emotions'; you will be punished BY
Pay attention, simplify, and (Meditation instruction in a nutshell) "Mind - the Gap." ‘Absit invidia verbo’ - may ill-will be absent from the word.
And mindful of that, if I don't respond, this
may be why....