A Buddhist discussion forum on the Dhamma of Theravāda Buddhism
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If the answer to a question falls into one of the "he does not say them" categories, I suppose it would constitute Right Speech to remain silent. Right Speech trumps being perceived as rude. Plus it's hard to say if it would have been considered rude within the time and culture of the Buddha.[1] In the case of words that the Tathagata knows to be unfactual, untrue, unbeneficial (or: not connected with the goal), unendearing & disagreeable to others, he does not say them.
[2] In the case of words that the Tathagata knows to be factual, true, unbeneficial, unendearing & disagreeable to others, he does not say them.
[3] In the case of words that the Tathagata knows to be factual, true, beneficial, but unendearing & disagreeable to others, he has a sense of the proper time for saying them.
[4] In the case of words that the Tathagata knows to be unfactual, untrue, unbeneficial, but endearing & agreeable to others, he does not say them.
[5] In the case of words that the Tathagata knows to be factual, true, unbeneficial, but endearing & agreeable to others, he does not say them.
[6] In the case of words that the Tathagata knows to be factual, true, beneficial, and endearing & agreeable to others, he has a sense of the proper time for saying them. Why is that? Because the Tathagata has sympathy for living beings."
(from Abhaya Sutta, translated by Thanissaro Bhikkhu)
Is it ok? If it really is Right Speech to do so, sure. But it depends on your audience too. A friend familiar with the Dhamma would probably get what you're doing, but the average person probably wouldn't receive it well. The Buddha was skilled at giving a response based on his audience, so it would be good to keep that in mind too.Wind wrote:And if this is a proper response to an inappropriate question, would it be ok for us to use it? There are times when I rather remain silent than respond but then people get upset at my silence.
Hehehe - i guess it does defeat the purpose...Wind wrote:Yes, explaining your silence would be courteous but it would also defeat the purpose of the silence. Did the Buddha ever explain his silence to the questioner? I know he explains it to Ananda when he ask. I guess I am trying to understand and follow the Buddha's example and use the silent answer appropriately.
I think it's significant that most people who were asking the Buddha questions were going to him for teaching, though there were a few that were trying to trip him up with his words.Wind wrote:Yes, explaining your silence would be courteous but it would also defeat the purpose of the silence. Did the Buddha ever explain his silence to the questioner? I know he explains it to Ananda when he ask. I guess I am trying to understand and follow the Buddha's example and use the silent answer appropriately.
Goofaholix's pointing out who you are and who is asking the question with Agent's pointing to the cultural setting - all these things factor into what is Right Speech. Just because silence is one form of Right Speech - even when silence is the correct answer - in a paraphrased manner of speaking - doesn't the Buddha warn that if you dogmatically adhere to your views they tend to get rigid and you can trip on them?Goofaholix wrote:So if you are a highly respected teacher I don't see a problem with it, if you aren't then probably best to explain why you won't answer so as not to be considered pompous.
The Buddha's examples worked for the Buddha - they may not work for you. He did what He did for perfect reasons - ours fall short. Go sit under a Bohdi tree as long as you like - no Enlightenment is guaranteed although it worked wonderfully for Gotama. The reason to practice is to make it your own. Is my thinking out of line on this? <Hmmm... why is everyone being silent?Wind wrote:I am trying to ... follow the Buddha's example and use the silent answer appropriately.
>No, because this is ancient India, where Gurus command (almost) unlimited respect and reverence. The Buddha's disciples would know how to read silence.Wind wrote:Sometimes when somebody ask the Buddha an unbeneficial question, he would not answer back but remain silent. Is the Buddha not concern that his silence might be misinterpreted as being rude?
I think silence is rarely appropriate in an informal setting, or in communication among friendly peers. If I get asked an out-of-context or an inappropriate question, I'd try to rephrase it. If that does not work, perhaps ask back, defuse it with a jest, or use it to build a bridge to another question.Wind wrote:And if this is a proper response to an inappropriate question, would it be ok for us to use it? There are times when I rather remain silent than respond but then people get upset at my silence.
I recommend that you maintain your precepts, develop samadhi and panna - this is following the Buddha's example. Remaining silent when questioned can be so easily misinterpreted. If you are confronted by a question you would much rather not answer - answer as politely and equanimously as you can.Wind wrote:I guess I am trying to understand and follow the Buddha's example and use the silent answer appropriately.