Liking and disliking people

A discussion on all aspects of Theravāda Buddhism
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befriend
Posts: 1413
Joined: Thu Jun 09, 2011 11:39 am

Liking and disliking people

Post by befriend » Sat Apr 13, 2019 11:35 pm

Should we cultivate a mind/heart that avoids liking and disliking people and develop an attitude of loving Everyone based on metta (unconditional love) is this possible? Or is it even a correct part of the path?
Take care of mindfulness and mindfulness will take care of you.

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cappuccino
Posts: 2911
Joined: Thu Feb 11, 2016 1:45 am

Re: Liking and disliking people

Post by cappuccino » Sun Apr 14, 2019 12:03 am

grant them impersonality as well

2600htz
Posts: 482
Joined: Fri Aug 27, 2010 11:37 pm

Re: Liking and disliking people

Post by 2600htz » Sun Apr 14, 2019 12:29 am

Hello:

Emm no, you can like some people more than others.
But you should avoid cravings: lust or aversion towards friends/enemies.
The friend[56] has passed away,
The Master, too, has gone.
There is no friendship now that equals this:
The mindfulness directed bodywards.
Regards.

santa100
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Joined: Fri Jun 10, 2011 10:55 pm

Re: Liking and disliking people

Post by santa100 » Sun Apr 14, 2019 2:22 am

befriend wrote:Should we cultivate a mind/heart that avoids liking and disliking people and develop an attitude of loving Everyone based on metta (unconditional love) is this possible? Or is it even a correct part of the path?
In principle, yes. But in practice, what exactly do we mean unconditional love? If your kids are naughty, is it really love to stay silence and let them continue to be naughty? If your friend cheats, steals, or commits adultery, is being frank and honest in confronting your friend about his problem an attitude of loving, or is it the opposite?

binocular
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Joined: Sat Jan 17, 2009 11:13 pm

Re: Liking and disliking people

Post by binocular » Sun Apr 14, 2019 9:40 am

befriend wrote:
Sat Apr 13, 2019 11:35 pm
Should we cultivate a mind/heart that avoids liking and disliking people and develop an attitude of loving Everyone based on metta (unconditional love) is this possible? Or is it even a correct part of the path?
For all practical intents and purposes, minding your own business is part of the Path, and part of minding your own business is to be above liking and disliking people.
Every person we save is one less zombie to fight. -- World War Z

budo
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Joined: Thu Nov 11, 2010 12:16 am

Re: Liking and disliking people

Post by budo » Sun Apr 14, 2019 9:53 am

Some suttas say to stay away from fools, alcoholics/drug users, gamblers, etc..

You can stay away from a tiger or snake and not dislike it, you can stay away from drugs and not dislike it, because you realize it's not good for your well being.

I view people like I do animals and objects. Forms and objects, some bound with consciousness, some aren't.

I know modern women and progressives like to say "Don't treat me like an object", but they are simply objects, just the 4 elements bound with electricity.

The problem is not treating people like objects, it's how you treat objects in general, which is a problem with yourself and not the objects.

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