If You Meet Jesus on The Road...

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BubbaBuddhist
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If You Meet Jesus on The Road...

Post by BubbaBuddhist » Thu Apr 22, 2010 6:06 pm

If You Meet Jesus on the Road...

About ten years ago at about 4 O'clock in the morning, my late friend Sam and I were driving to the Raleigh Durham airport to catch a flight to a Florida series of performances, along a very dark back road, and son of a bitch if I didn't see Jesus Christ, robe, sandals and all other Christly accouterments, walking along the roadside.

I looked at Sam, who stared at the road ahead with a glassy, dazed expression. He said, "You see Him too?"

I said, "Yes.”

"Thank God."

Sam's face worked as he struggled with a decision. He pulled over, looked at me, then spun the car in the opposite direction. He said, "If Jesus isn't on the side of that damned road—we're NOT getting on that airplane."

We drove back and there He was, the spitting image of Jesus strolling up the road. We watched as Our Savior walked up to a parking area, hitched his robes, climbed into a rusty pickup truck and drove off.

Speech failed us. Sam started the car and we continued on our way to the airport.

As we drove further up the road, and as the sun rose over the wintry horizon, we saw a sign on a church announcing an all night Christmas pageant. Obviously our Jesus was walking to his truck after the performance. It was all right though. As Christ had spun out of the parking lot, a cigarette dangling from his lips, he’d given us a thumbs-up. I took this as a portent it would be okay for us to board our flight.

For ten minutes, we almost thought we had experienced an epiphany.

J
Author of Redneck Buddhism: or Will You Reincarnate as Your Own Cousin?

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Fede
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Re: If You Meet Jesus on The Road...

Post by Fede » Thu Apr 22, 2010 8:04 pm

No, your timing's out....

Epiphany is the festival marking the visit of the Magi to the Christ Child,
Jesus would have been a wee baby then.
Are you sure it wasn't Joseph?
According to the Bible, Jesus wouldn't even have been walking then, let alone driving a pick-up truck and smoking.
Something Joseph would undoubtedly have done.

Are you SURE it wasn't Joseph....?
"Samsara: The human condition's heartbreaking inability to sustain contentment." Elizabeth Gilbert, 'Eat, Pray, Love'.

Simplify: 17 into 1 WILL go: Mindfulness!

Quieta movere magna merces videbatur. (Sallust, c.86-c.35 BC)
Translation: Just to stir things up seemed a good reward in itself. ;)

I am sooooo happy - How on earth could I be otherwise?! :D


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BubbaBuddhist
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Re: If You Meet Jesus on The Road...

Post by BubbaBuddhist » Thu Apr 22, 2010 9:05 pm

Epiphany:
-The manifestation of deities on earth such as Angels appearing to mortals.
-the sudden realization or comprehension of the essence or meaning of something.
-a sudden, intuitive perception of or insight into the reality or essential meaning of something, usually initiated by some simple, homely, or commonplace occurrence or experience.
-a Christian holiday on January 6 celebrating the visit of the Magi to the infant Jesus.

Pick one. :P

J
Author of Redneck Buddhism: or Will You Reincarnate as Your Own Cousin?

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Goofaholix
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Re: If You Meet Jesus on The Road...

Post by Goofaholix » Fri Apr 23, 2010 1:05 am

As the Zen saying goes "If you see Jesus on the road kill him!"

Of course it begs the question how do you know what Jesus looks like unless you've met him before?
“Peace is within oneself to be found in the same place as agitation and suffering. It is not found in a forest or on a hilltop, nor is it given by a teacher. Where you experience suffering, you can also find freedom from suffering. Trying to run away from suffering is actually to run toward it.” ― Ajahn Chah

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Kim OHara
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Re: If You Meet Jesus on The Road...

Post by Kim OHara » Fri Apr 23, 2010 2:58 am

Goofaholix wrote:As the Zen saying goes "If you see Jesus on the road kill him!"
I was sure someone would say that. I'm glad you resisted the urge to disappoint me. I think.

While I'm writing ... this book is a good one:
http://www.harpercollins.com.au/books/9 ... index.aspx
Sort of Jurassic Park with a Christian-provoking angle.
:reading:
Kim

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Fede
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Re: If You Meet Jesus on The Road...

Post by Fede » Fri Apr 23, 2010 4:50 am

Bubbabuddhist wrote:Epiphany:
-The manifestation of deities on earth such as Angels appearing to mortals.
-the sudden realization or comprehension of the essence or meaning of something.
-a sudden, intuitive perception of or insight into the reality or essential meaning of something, usually initiated by some simple, homely, or commonplace occurrence or experience.
-a Christian holiday on January 6 celebrating the visit of the Magi to the infant Jesus.

Pick one. :P

J
I thought I had..... :thinking:
I see you're neatly avoiding the question, though.
You won't admit that maybe there is a possibility that - what with it having been a Christmas pageant - it could have been Joseph you saw, as opposed to Jesus.

I mean, if you ARE going to have a vision, you might as well open your mind to the possible permutations....
Any more definitive clues?
Crown of thorns?
Stigmata?
See?
:stirthepot:

It could be a possible mistaken identity thing.... ;)
See, I'm just trying to inject logic into your vision....
"Samsara: The human condition's heartbreaking inability to sustain contentment." Elizabeth Gilbert, 'Eat, Pray, Love'.

Simplify: 17 into 1 WILL go: Mindfulness!

Quieta movere magna merces videbatur. (Sallust, c.86-c.35 BC)
Translation: Just to stir things up seemed a good reward in itself. ;)

I am sooooo happy - How on earth could I be otherwise?! :D


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plwk
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Re: If You Meet Jesus on The Road...

Post by plwk » Fri Apr 23, 2010 4:53 am

If You Meet Jesus on The Road...
Kill him...

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jcsuperstar
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Re: If You Meet Jesus on The Road...

Post by jcsuperstar » Fri Apr 23, 2010 5:28 am

ask him who he'd bomb?
สัพเพ สัตตา สุขีตา โหนตุ

the mountain may be heavy in and of itself, but if you're not trying to carry it it's not heavy to you- Ajaan Suwat

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Ben
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Re: If You Meet Jesus on The Road...

Post by Ben » Fri Apr 23, 2010 5:35 am

Fede!
Shhhh!
Let Jon tell his story!
kind regards

Ben
“No lists of things to be done. The day providential to itself. The hour. There is no later. This is later. All things of grace and beauty such that one holds them to one's heart have a common provenance in pain. Their birth in grief and ashes.”
- Cormac McCarthy, The Road

Learn this from the waters:
in mountain clefts and chasms,
loud gush the streamlets,
but great rivers flow silently.
- Sutta Nipata 3.725

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PeterB
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Re: If You Meet Jesus on The Road...

Post by PeterB » Fri Apr 23, 2010 8:42 am

Kim O'Hara wrote:
Goofaholix wrote:As the Zen saying goes "If you see Jesus on the road kill him!"
I was sure someone would say that. I'm glad you resisted the urge to disappoint me. I think.

While I'm writing ... this book is a good one:
http://www.harpercollins.com.au/books/9 ... index.aspx
Sort of Jurassic Park with a Christian-provoking angle.
:reading:
Kim
:smile:

I met Buddha on the road. He killed me.

PeterB
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Re: If You Meet Jesus on The Road...

Post by PeterB » Fri Apr 23, 2010 8:53 am

Back on the ol ' Grey Forum I proposed a moratorium on
" If you meet the Buddha on the road etc "
" Finger pointing at the moon "
And
" We are all already Buddhas "


My proposal was met with a lack of enthusiasm.

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tiltbillings
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Re: If You Meet Jesus on The Road...

Post by tiltbillings » Fri Apr 23, 2010 8:57 am

Once when I was driving down the road, past a house with a messy yard and with a passel of snotty, dirty children playing in the yard, there was one kid in all that mess and turmoil holding to his ear a plumber's friend , shouting at the top of his lungs: "CALLING GOD, CALLING GOD!!!" That tableau seemed to sum it all up somehow.
Attachments
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plumder's friend: the thingie used to unplug toilets.
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>> Do you see a man wise [enlightened/ariya] in his own eyes? There is more hope for a fool than for him.<< -- Proverbs 26:12

This being is bound to samsara, kamma is his means for going beyond. -- SN I, 38.

“Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why on earth should that mean that it is not real?” HPatDH p.723

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tiltbillings
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Re: If You Meet Jesus on The Road...

Post by tiltbillings » Fri Apr 23, 2010 8:59 am

PeterB wrote:Back on the ol ' Grey Forum I proposed a moratorium on
" If you meet the Buddha on the road etc "
" Finger pointing at the moon "
And
" We are all already Buddhas "


My proposal was met with a lack of enthusiasm.
That is basic Zen-ese (among a few other sayings) for stopping conversations that are perceived as too intellectual.
>> Do you see a man wise [enlightened/ariya] in his own eyes? There is more hope for a fool than for him.<< -- Proverbs 26:12

This being is bound to samsara, kamma is his means for going beyond. -- SN I, 38.

“Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why on earth should that mean that it is not real?” HPatDH p.723

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BubbaBuddhist
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Re: If You Meet Jesus on The Road...

Post by BubbaBuddhist » Fri Apr 23, 2010 2:18 pm

When people go all Zen on me, I moon them, then give them the finger. I read the koan wrong I think. Guess its why I never took to Zen. That and getting whacked with a stick. We don't take to that in the South.

But some background info may be in order for those of you who may not be familiar with Southern American culture. From Thanksgiving until Christmas Eve, Southern Christian Churches perform elaborate Christmas pageants, complete with music and, depending on budget, elaborate staging and costume, celebrating the entire career of the Man from Nazareth, from birth to death to rebirth to Ascension. My second wife, who was Episcopalian, was a devout member of the largest--and richest--WASP Episcopalian church in East Tennessee, and their pageant was magnificent.

This church had the largest pipe organ in the state, complete with full array of trumpets. Now that I know a little bit about keyboard, how I would love to get my hands on it. I loved that organ. It's mighty voice rattled the buildings across the street, and as everyone knows, the larger the organ, the more intense is God's scrutiny.

The priest was an okay bloke named Father Joe; he and I exchanged Green Lantern Comics. Actually I loaned him issues from my extensive collection, and we'd have lunch and geek out over Hal Jordan and Allen Scott. I taught him a great deal about Buddhism--he actually wanted to know about it. Episcopalians are cool people. They don't care if you drink, if you're gay, if you enjoy dancing and coitus, or if you're an agnostic Buddhist--if you're a good person, you're okay with them.

Like the Baptist Church of my youth, they occasionally tried to get me to portray The Big Man in the pageant due to my dark complexion, deep dramatic voice and other wholesome spiritual qualities. The elderly ladies of the congregation always tried to get me into the fold, you see. Even though everyone knew I was a heathen, I was a diamond in the rough. I suspect they hoped for a flash-conversion if i donned the robes of Jeshua.

Needless to say, I declined. I knew I could never do this with a straight face. Most people have a little imp on one shoulder and a little angel on the other, constantly urging them to good and bad deeds. For most people, the angel wins. Unfortunately, my angel developed Alzheimer years ago and has been negligent in his job for so long the Imp of the Perverse has held sway over my actions since childhood. Putting me in the starring role of the Life of Jesus would be an act of desecration second only to using the Shroud of Turin as a washroom towel at an all-you-can-eat chili dinner at the Alabama vs Florida tailgate party.

I knew it had to be Jesus strolling down that dark highway, not his father Joseph. Joseph is traditionally portrayed in these pageants as an old man, gray of hair and wearing dark robes. The adult Jesus is played by a man in his twenties or early thirties and ALWAYS wears a white robe. So my Roadside Jesus was clearly the Son of God, not the Father of the Son of God, the one Cuckold in history who had to grin and bear it or get struck by lighting. Besides, Joseph smoked a pipe, Jesus smoked Marlboros, he was a rebellious youth.


J
Author of Redneck Buddhism: or Will You Reincarnate as Your Own Cousin?

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Sekha
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Re: If You Meet Jesus on The Road...

Post by Sekha » Fri Apr 23, 2010 3:58 pm

tiltbillings wrote:Once when I was driving down the road, past a house with a messy yard and with a passel of snotty, dirty children playing in the yard, there was one kid in all that mess and turmoil holding to his ear a plumber's friend , shouting at the top of his lungs: "CALLING GOD, CALLING GOD!!!" That tableau seemed to sum it all up somehow.
you're cracking me up

Having been brought up in quite a severe traditionalist catholic family, and having gone far away from this conditioning, I still don't think it is that bad.

Christian beliefs have their wrong side, but they are still better than having no moral landmarks at all. This is what I am witnessing here every day.
Where knowledge ends, religion begins. - B. Disraeli

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