You can keep bemoaning your situation here and making excuses, or get help outside yourself.
Your way of doing things has not worked. And it isn't working now.
Buddhism and alcohol
- oncereturner
- Posts: 280
- Joined: Tue Jun 06, 2017 3:15 am
- Location: Hungary
Re: Buddhism and alcohol
This old relationship doesn't work Sir, exactly as you said. Thank you for the warning. She played her old foolish games with me. I got very angry, drunk and smashed my TV with a wrench. Finally it is over. Next day I was late 4 hours at my workplace, with a serious hangover. I wonder i still have a job.dharmacorps wrote: ↑Sat Nov 18, 2017 8:00 pm I'm sorry if this isn't well received Oncereturner, but looking to girlfriends or old relationships to help you get sober is not going to help you. In fact, it will hurt you. This person is an added stressor in your life and is going to make things far far worse, regardless of how good of a person she is.
Please take advantage of us here on this forum who have been down this road and save yourself some needless suffering-- go to a AA meeting and swallow your pride. The people in those rooms know how to help you solve your problem and have done it.
You have a situation now where you can choose further alcoholic torture, or the possibility of making a real change. Any hope from this rekindling the old relationship will fade, and probably destroy any relationship you have with her because you are still actively in addiction. Seen it innumerable times.
Today evening I will go to a piano concert, if I can still walk.
"And what is right speech? Abstaining from lying, from divisive speech, from abusive speech, & from idle chatter: This is called right speech."
— SN 45.8
— SN 45.8
- Pseudobabble
- Posts: 938
- Joined: Mon Apr 17, 2017 11:11 am
- Location: London
Re: Buddhism and alcohol
My friend,oncereturner wrote:...
I sympathise - my mother was an alcoholic, and the end result was death, not a nice way either. Please leave your present pattern - go somewhere else, meet different people. Bodom's suggestions are excellent, and I would like to add: present behavioural patterns are held in place by all the other patterns in your life. It can help you to shake loose present patterns to be in a different location, or around different people, or doing different things. For me, going to a new place always helps to break patterns. Perhaps you could stay at a monastery. Please PM me if you feel like it.
"Does Master Gotama have any position at all?"
"A 'position,' Vaccha, is something that a Tathagata has done away with. What a Tathagata sees is this: 'Such is form, such its origination, such its disappearance; such is feeling, such its origination, such its disappearance; such is perception...such are fabrications...such is consciousness, such its origination, such its disappearance.'" - Aggi-Vacchagotta Sutta
'Dust thou art, and unto dust thou shalt return.' - Genesis 3:19
'Some fart freely, some try to hide and silence it. Which one is correct?' - Saegnapha
"A 'position,' Vaccha, is something that a Tathagata has done away with. What a Tathagata sees is this: 'Such is form, such its origination, such its disappearance; such is feeling, such its origination, such its disappearance; such is perception...such are fabrications...such is consciousness, such its origination, such its disappearance.'" - Aggi-Vacchagotta Sutta
'Dust thou art, and unto dust thou shalt return.' - Genesis 3:19
'Some fart freely, some try to hide and silence it. Which one is correct?' - Saegnapha
- oncereturner
- Posts: 280
- Joined: Tue Jun 06, 2017 3:15 am
- Location: Hungary
Re: Buddhism and alcohol
My grandfather also died from alcohol addiction. My father is an alcoholic too, as far as I know, he still lives, but he was in a very bad condition 15 years ago, so I'm not sure that he is still alive.Pseudobabble wrote: ↑Wed Dec 13, 2017 7:43 pmMy friend,oncereturner wrote:...
I sympathise - my mother was an alcoholic, and the end result was death, not a nice way either. Please leave your present pattern - go somewhere else, meet different people. Bodom's suggestions are excellent, and I would like to add: present behavioural patterns are held in place by all the other patterns in your life. It can help you to shake loose present patterns to be in a different location, or around different people, or doing different things. For me, going to a new place always helps to break patterns. Perhaps you could stay at a monastery. Please PM me if you feel like it.
I still thinking about Bodom's suggestions, and it's very clear to me that I must to go rehab. It's likely that his comments will save my life. I may lose my job, but I don't like it anyway. If I don't drink I have horrible withdrawal symptoms. I don't create more excuses. It's clear that I will die too, maybe next year, if I don't stop. I go to rehab.
"And what is right speech? Abstaining from lying, from divisive speech, from abusive speech, & from idle chatter: This is called right speech."
— SN 45.8
— SN 45.8
Re: Buddhism and alcohol
So happy for you! A life you never thought possible, a freedom you never thought possible, waits for you on the other side. Please stay in touch to let us know your progress.oncereturner wrote: ↑Thu Dec 14, 2017 3:47 amMy grandfather also died from alcohol addiction. My father is an alcoholic too, as far as I know, he still lives, but he was in a very bad condition 15 years ago, so I'm not sure that he is still alive.Pseudobabble wrote: ↑Wed Dec 13, 2017 7:43 pmMy friend,oncereturner wrote:...
I sympathise - my mother was an alcoholic, and the end result was death, not a nice way either. Please leave your present pattern - go somewhere else, meet different people. Bodom's suggestions are excellent, and I would like to add: present behavioural patterns are held in place by all the other patterns in your life. It can help you to shake loose present patterns to be in a different location, or around different people, or doing different things. For me, going to a new place always helps to break patterns. Perhaps you could stay at a monastery. Please PM me if you feel like it.
I still thinking about Bodom's suggestions, and it's very clear to me that I must to go rehab. It's likely that his comments will save my life. I may lose my job, but I don't like it anyway. If I don't drink I have horrible withdrawal symptoms. I don't create more excuses. It's clear that I will die too, maybe next year, if I don't stop. I go to rehab.
Liberation is the inevitable fruit of the path and is bound to blossom forth when there is steady and persistent practice. The only requirements for reaching the final goal are two: to start and to continue. If these requirements are met there is no doubt the goal will be attained. This is the Dhamma, the undeviating law.
- BB
- BB
- oncereturner
- Posts: 280
- Joined: Tue Jun 06, 2017 3:15 am
- Location: Hungary
Re: Buddhism and alcohol
No, the medical system in my country is much more underdeveloped compared to the US. I was in detox once, but they let me go next day. They accept people only with alcohol poisoning, and when they get sober, they can go out.
Going to rehab is not easy too. I can't just go there without a referral. I booked an appointment to my doctor for January. Then maybe he can give me a referral to a hospital, and from the hospital I can get into the rehab with another referral.
I have another idea. I had pancreas failure last year, and I feel a little pain sometimes in my pancreas again. Actually I don't feel pain right now, but I will tell the doctor so. I feel constant pain in my kidney, which is true. I will go to the surgery, and the doctor will send me into a hospital (with a referral), where they can examine my pancreas and liver. This will be the "detox".
Then I go right into the psychiatric hospital, from where the doctor can send me to the rehab.
Despite the complicated procedures, I will go into psychiatric hospital or rehab.
"And what is right speech? Abstaining from lying, from divisive speech, from abusive speech, & from idle chatter: This is called right speech."
— SN 45.8
— SN 45.8
- retrofuturist
- Posts: 27859
- Joined: Tue Dec 30, 2008 9:52 pm
- Location: Melbourne, Australia
- Contact:
Re: Buddhism and alcohol
Greetings,
Metta,
Paul.
I respect your determination... It will serve you well.oncereturner wrote: ↑Thu Dec 14, 2017 11:55 pm Despite the complicated procedures, I will go into psychiatric hospital or rehab.
Metta,
Paul.
"Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things."
- oncereturner
- Posts: 280
- Joined: Tue Jun 06, 2017 3:15 am
- Location: Hungary
Re: Buddhism and alcohol
I'm still hesitating and confused.
Going to hospital at Christmas is horrible feeling, and I'm very scared of going to hospital. They will push pins into my skin, taking blood and other painful examinations. I feel it's shame.
I feel comfortable with my job. I suffer and feel pain all over my body, due to my addiction.
Going to hospital at Christmas is horrible feeling, and I'm very scared of going to hospital. They will push pins into my skin, taking blood and other painful examinations. I feel it's shame.
I feel comfortable with my job. I suffer and feel pain all over my body, due to my addiction.
"And what is right speech? Abstaining from lying, from divisive speech, from abusive speech, & from idle chatter: This is called right speech."
— SN 45.8
— SN 45.8
- Pseudobabble
- Posts: 938
- Joined: Mon Apr 17, 2017 11:11 am
- Location: London
Re: Buddhism and alcohol
Just go. A little pain now vs a lifetime of pain otherwise. It's a simple choice.oncereturner wrote: ↑Fri Dec 15, 2017 10:24 am I'm still hesitating and confused.
Going to hospital at Christmas is horrible feeling, and I'm very scared of going to hospital. They will push pins into my skin, taking blood and other painful examinations. I feel it's shame.
I feel comfortable with my job. I suffer and feel pain all over my body, due to my addiction.
"Does Master Gotama have any position at all?"
"A 'position,' Vaccha, is something that a Tathagata has done away with. What a Tathagata sees is this: 'Such is form, such its origination, such its disappearance; such is feeling, such its origination, such its disappearance; such is perception...such are fabrications...such is consciousness, such its origination, such its disappearance.'" - Aggi-Vacchagotta Sutta
'Dust thou art, and unto dust thou shalt return.' - Genesis 3:19
'Some fart freely, some try to hide and silence it. Which one is correct?' - Saegnapha
"A 'position,' Vaccha, is something that a Tathagata has done away with. What a Tathagata sees is this: 'Such is form, such its origination, such its disappearance; such is feeling, such its origination, such its disappearance; such is perception...such are fabrications...such is consciousness, such its origination, such its disappearance.'" - Aggi-Vacchagotta Sutta
'Dust thou art, and unto dust thou shalt return.' - Genesis 3:19
'Some fart freely, some try to hide and silence it. Which one is correct?' - Saegnapha
Re: Buddhism and alcohol
If going to the hospital over the holidays means that you won't miss out on work, then that is so much better!oncereturner wrote: ↑Fri Dec 15, 2017 10:24 amI'm still hesitating and confused.
Going to hospital at Christmas is horrible feeling, and I'm very scared of going to hospital. They will push pins into my skin, taking blood and other painful examinations. I feel it's shame.
I feel comfortable with my job. I suffer and feel pain all over my body, due to my addiction.
Hic Rhodus, hic salta!
-
- Posts: 2298
- Joined: Thu Aug 06, 2015 7:33 pm
Re: Buddhism and alcohol
The suffering at the hospital will be nothing compared to the suffering of further alcoholic torture. If you continue to drink you are garunteeing yourself a lot more time in the hospital. You are actually saving yourself pain. Don't be afraid, taking this step is one you will not regret.oncereturner wrote: ↑Fri Dec 15, 2017 10:24 am I'm still hesitating and confused.
Going to hospital at Christmas is horrible feeling, and I'm very scared of going to hospital. They will push pins into my skin, taking blood and other painful examinations. I feel it's shame.
I feel comfortable with my job. I suffer and feel pain all over my body, due to my addiction.
- oncereturner
- Posts: 280
- Joined: Tue Jun 06, 2017 3:15 am
- Location: Hungary
Re: Buddhism and alcohol
Another total failure.
Instead going to the hospital, I decided to go to a company Christmas party. I got totally drunk for free.
I kissed and embraced beautiful girls, I danced with them, At last... . One of them was a beautiful blonde. This is a thing I could never imagine that could happen to me. I said to her that she is beautiful (and maybe I said that I love her).
Another girl said that she likes the same rap music I like. My craving (tahna) is on the higher level.
I guess I am lost in samsara.
Instead going to the hospital, I decided to go to a company Christmas party. I got totally drunk for free.
I kissed and embraced beautiful girls, I danced with them, At last... . One of them was a beautiful blonde. This is a thing I could never imagine that could happen to me. I said to her that she is beautiful (and maybe I said that I love her).
Another girl said that she likes the same rap music I like. My craving (tahna) is on the higher level.
I guess I am lost in samsara.
"And what is right speech? Abstaining from lying, from divisive speech, from abusive speech, & from idle chatter: This is called right speech."
— SN 45.8
— SN 45.8
- retrofuturist
- Posts: 27859
- Joined: Tue Dec 30, 2008 9:52 pm
- Location: Melbourne, Australia
- Contact:
Re: Buddhism and alcohol
Greetings,
The hospital is still there...
Metta,
Paul.
The hospital is still there...
Metta,
Paul.
"Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things."
- Pseudobabble
- Posts: 938
- Joined: Mon Apr 17, 2017 11:11 am
- Location: London
Re: Buddhism and alcohol
Fail.oncereturner wrote: ↑Sat Dec 16, 2017 12:37 am Another total failure.
Instead going to the hospital, I decided to go to a company Christmas party. I got totally drunk for free.
I kissed and embraced beautiful girls, I danced with them, At last... . One of them was a beautiful blonde. This is a thing I could never imagine that could happen to me. I said to her that she is beautiful (and maybe I said that I love her).
Another girl said that she likes the same rap music I like. My craving (tahna) is on the higher level.
I guess I am lost in samsara.
Try again.
Fail.
Try again.
Fail.
Try again.
...
As long as the desire to get better does not leave your deepest heart, keep going.
"Does Master Gotama have any position at all?"
"A 'position,' Vaccha, is something that a Tathagata has done away with. What a Tathagata sees is this: 'Such is form, such its origination, such its disappearance; such is feeling, such its origination, such its disappearance; such is perception...such are fabrications...such is consciousness, such its origination, such its disappearance.'" - Aggi-Vacchagotta Sutta
'Dust thou art, and unto dust thou shalt return.' - Genesis 3:19
'Some fart freely, some try to hide and silence it. Which one is correct?' - Saegnapha
"A 'position,' Vaccha, is something that a Tathagata has done away with. What a Tathagata sees is this: 'Such is form, such its origination, such its disappearance; such is feeling, such its origination, such its disappearance; such is perception...such are fabrications...such is consciousness, such its origination, such its disappearance.'" - Aggi-Vacchagotta Sutta
'Dust thou art, and unto dust thou shalt return.' - Genesis 3:19
'Some fart freely, some try to hide and silence it. Which one is correct?' - Saegnapha