Joke!!! 2.0

Casual discussion amongst spiritual friends.
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CedarTree
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Re: Joke!!! 2.0

Post by CedarTree » Tue Aug 29, 2017 3:19 pm

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Aloka
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Re: Joke!!! 2.0

Post by Aloka » Tue Aug 29, 2017 4:05 pm

Sea Turtle wrote: I'm the female breadwinner of my family. And the all-around glue that holds everything together, preventing the scenario depicted in image #3. So, nope, I don't relate to this either.

:goodpost:

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CedarTree
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Re: Joke!!! 2.0

Post by CedarTree » Tue Aug 29, 2017 4:21 pm

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Disciple
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Re: Joke!!! 2.0

Post by Disciple » Wed Aug 30, 2017 6:06 am

Aloka wrote: A blatantly sexist "joke" which has never been true in connection with myself as a woman, nor anyone I've ever known.
I know a few men including a cousin of mine who have been taken to the cleaners by their ex wives in divorce courts. These situations are very common where I live. It is not sexist, just the reality.

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Re: Joke!!! 2.0

Post by Disciple » Wed Aug 30, 2017 6:28 am

How to tell if your dog is involved in a sex scandal

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cjmacie
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Re: Joke!!! 2.0

Post by cjmacie » Wed Aug 30, 2017 7:18 am

This could go into one of the political threads, but probably less inflammatory here...
DC082917.jpg
DC082917.jpg (54.25 KiB) Viewed 2014 times
https://www.newyorker.com/cartoons/dail ... Y1NjM5OQS2

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CedarTree
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Re: Joke!!! 2.0

Post by CedarTree » Thu Aug 31, 2017 9:10 pm

The message of intense Zen places like Gyobutsuji Zen Monastery, Antai-ji, and Sanshin Zen Community summed up hah. :tongue:

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Coëmgenu
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Re: Joke!!! 2.0

Post by Coëmgenu » Thu Aug 31, 2017 9:36 pm

binocular wrote:
Coëmgenu wrote:A Buddhist, a Christian, a Muslim, a Hindu, and a Jew talk into a bar and the bartender says:
"Orange you glad I didn't say banana?!"
...maybe I shouldn't tell jokes.
I don't get it ...
It is my strange sense of humour. There is a certain beautiful qualia to the perfect non-sequitur, IMO.

The set-up for an "ethnic" or "religious" joke is interrupted by the bartender, who, instead of referencing the relevant party, is concluding a rendition of a silly childhood joke that is popular here in Canada (and I assume in America?), to an audience that is not mentioned in the set-up for the joke.

Like I said, I don't tell that many jokes (actually I do). But maybe I shouldn't.

The joke, which most Canadian youths know, at least, is:

"Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"Banana."
["Banana who?"
"Banana."]
[repeat bracketed elements ad nauseam, then finally, at one point:]
"Who's there?"
"Orange."
"...orange who?"
"Orange you glad I didn't say banana?"

"Orange" sounds like "aren't" to a native speaker of Canadian (and American, I assume) English. Its a terrible horrible no good very bad pun.
世尊在靈山會上拈華示眾眾皆默然唯迦葉破顏微笑世尊云
The Lord dwelt at the Vulture Peak with the assembly and plucked a flower as a teaching. The myriad totality were silent, save for Kāśyapa, whose face cracked in a faint smile. The Lord spoke.
吾有正法眼藏涅槃妙心實相無相微妙法門不立文字教外別傳付囑摩訶迦葉。
I have the treasure of the true dharma eye, I have nirvāṇa as wondrous citta, I know signless dharmatā, the subtle dharma-gate, which is not standing on written word, which is external to scriptures, which is a special dispensation, which is entrusted to Mahākāśyapa.

नस्वातोनापिपरतोनद्वाभ्यांनाप्यहेतुतः

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cjmacie
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Re: Joke!!! 2.0

Post by cjmacie » Fri Sep 01, 2017 7:58 am

Coëmgenu wrote:
binocular wrote:
Coëmgenu wrote:A Buddhist, a Christian, a Muslim, a Hindu, and a Jew talk into a bar and the bartender says:
"Orange you glad I didn't say banana?!"
...maybe I shouldn't tell jokes.
I don't get it ...
It is my strange sense of humour. There is a certain beautiful qualia to the perfect non-sequitur, IMO.
...."Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"Banana."
["Banana who?"
"Banana."]
[repeat bracketed elements ad nauseam, then finally, at one point:]
"Who's there?"
"Orange."
"...orange who?"
"Orange you glad I didn't say banana?"

"Orange" sounds like "aren't" to a native speaker of Canadian (and American, I assume) English. Its a terrible horrible no good very bad pun.
In American pronunciation (at least to my ear) it might be phrased more as:
"Orange glad I didn't say banana"? Or more precisely "Or[a]n-ge glad..." sounding like "Orn-jh(e) glad I didn't say banana?"

That is to say, the "-ge" sound at the end is barely voiced, just a consonant sound with a lot of aspiration ("h"-ness) in it, which does sound like the "...t you" of "aren't you" when pronounced in common, slurred speech -- sounded more like "choo". Saying "aren't" and then "you" distinctly requires a sort of pause between the "t" and the "you". Said rapidly they run together and "tyou" comes out with a lot of "h", i.e. "th" but more like "ch".

And this sound is quite close to the soft "g" "-g(e)" in 'orange' (as distinct from the hard "g" as in "gas"), but actually rather more like "j", or "jh. The distinction between "ch..." and "jh..." is subtle in American English.

(Though it might more critical in a language like Mandarin Chinese where soft "g", soft "c" and "j" are meaningfully distinct. Inversely, the "b" and "p" distinction in Chinese isn't that important, where it is in English -- they might say, for instance "bee-pee" for English "pee-pee". Like our case above, the difference here is the "h"-like aspiration in "p" which lacks in "b".)

btw: [Wikipedia] "The colour orange is named after the appearance of the ripe orange fruit.[2] The word comes from the Old French orange, from the old term for the fruit, pomme d'orange. The French word, in turn, comes from the Italian arancia,[3][4] based on Arabic nāranj, derived from the Sanskrit naranga.[5]"

And elsewhere: "Pali :nāraṅga : (m.) the mandarin orange tree"

[I would have guessed "orange" going back to Latin "aurantium" (gold), which, however, does get mentioned as the origin of Italian "arancia". But then that doesn't so smoothly lead back to the Arabic and Sanskrit (/Pali) forms. (?) And the lineage from Sanskrit (Indo-Euopean) to Arabic (Semetic, NOT Indo European) and back to European languages? ]

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robertk
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Re: Joke!!! 2.0

Post by robertk » Fri Sep 01, 2017 10:19 am

And elsewhere: "Pali :nāraṅga : (m.) the mandarin orange tree"

[I would have guessed "orange" going back to Latin "aurantium" (gold), which, however, does get mentioned as the origin of Italian "arancia". But then that doesn't so smoothly lead back to the Arabic and Sanskrit (/Pali) forms. (?) And the lineage from Sanskrit (Indo-Euopean) to Arabic (Semetic, NOT Indo European) and back to European languages?
who said Buddhists don't have a sense of humor..

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Coëmgenu
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Re: Joke!!! 2.0

Post by Coëmgenu » Fri Sep 01, 2017 10:35 am

cjmacie wrote: In American pronunciation (at least to my ear) it might be phrased more as:
"Orange glad I didn't say banana"? Or more precisely "Or[a]n-ge glad..." sounding like "Orn-jh(e) glad I didn't say banana?"
Oh definitely. The "similarity" between the two is predicated on the elision (is that the proper term? It might only properly apply to vowels) of "orange/aren't" and "you".

I would ever hesitate to say that in rural Englishes, like my father's, the initial vowel of "orange" is almost completely assimilated into a syllabic "R" (like in "church") with nasalization. From there, the only differentiation between "orange" and "aren't" is the voicing of the final consonant, AFAIK.
世尊在靈山會上拈華示眾眾皆默然唯迦葉破顏微笑世尊云
The Lord dwelt at the Vulture Peak with the assembly and plucked a flower as a teaching. The myriad totality were silent, save for Kāśyapa, whose face cracked in a faint smile. The Lord spoke.
吾有正法眼藏涅槃妙心實相無相微妙法門不立文字教外別傳付囑摩訶迦葉。
I have the treasure of the true dharma eye, I have nirvāṇa as wondrous citta, I know signless dharmatā, the subtle dharma-gate, which is not standing on written word, which is external to scriptures, which is a special dispensation, which is entrusted to Mahākāśyapa.

नस्वातोनापिपरतोनद्वाभ्यांनाप्यहेतुतः

binocular
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Re: Joke!!! 2.0

Post by binocular » Fri Sep 01, 2017 12:59 pm

robertk wrote:who said Buddhists don't have a sense of humor..
Buddhists and humor -- like apples and oranges!
Every person we save is one less zombie to fight. -- World War Z

binocular
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Re: Joke!!! 2.0

Post by binocular » Fri Sep 01, 2017 1:13 pm

Coëmgenu wrote:
cjmacie wrote:In American pronunciation (at least to my ear) it might be phrased more as:
"Orange glad I didn't say banana"? Or more precisely "Or[a]n-ge glad..." sounding like "Orn-jh(e) glad I didn't say banana?"
Oh definitely. The "similarity" between the two is predicated on the elision (is that the proper term? It might only properly apply to vowels) of "orange/aren't" and "you".
I would ever hesitate to say that in rural Englishes, like my father's, the initial vowel of "orange" is almost completely assimilated into a syllabic "R" (like in "church") with nasalization. From there, the only differentiation between "orange" and "aren't" is the voicing of the final consonant, AFAIK.
Thanks for the explanation. I figured that the way "orange" should be pronounced in that joke is important, and I thought of pronouncing it the Australian way. But as a European, I am invincibly ignorant of knock-knock jokes. Several Americans have tried to teach me that type of joke, but it all resulted only in looks and sighs of disappointment ...

Beyond that, in my native language, the word for "orange" (the fruit) is "pomaranča" -- how's that for a synthesis of numerous sources?
Every person we save is one less zombie to fight. -- World War Z

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Coëmgenu
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Re: Joke!!! 2.0

Post by Coëmgenu » Fri Sep 01, 2017 1:44 pm

binocular wrote:
Coëmgenu wrote:
cjmacie wrote:
[...]

"Orange glad I didn't say banana"? Or more precisely "Or[a]n-ge glad..." sounding like "Orn-jh(e) glad I didn't say banana?"
Oh definitely.

[...]

I wouldn't even hesitate to say that in rural Englishes, like my father's, the initial vowel of "orange" is almost completely assimilated into a syllabic "R" (like in "church") with nasalization. From there, the only differentiation between "orange" and "aren't" is the voicing of the final consonant, AFAIK.

[...] as a European, I am invincibly ignorant of knock-knock jokes. Several Americans have tried to teach me that type of joke, but it all resulted only in looks and sighs of disappointment ...
Well, to be fair, this was an explosion of the conventions of a knock knock joke, which not all people necessarily will find amusing.

My favourite part though, has been the subsequent exchange and analysis of the joke, because I also find that, in it's way, amusing precisely because it is not particularly funny or amusing. It makes the "not-funny" root joke, even more amusing, in my strange sense of humour.
binocular wrote:"pomaranča" -- how's that for a synthesis of numerous sources?
Is that.... pomme, like in French... and then the ending looks Romanian (I know its not), to my unschooled eyes. I assume it is a portmanteau?
Last edited by Coëmgenu on Sat Sep 02, 2017 6:54 pm, edited 2 times in total.
世尊在靈山會上拈華示眾眾皆默然唯迦葉破顏微笑世尊云
The Lord dwelt at the Vulture Peak with the assembly and plucked a flower as a teaching. The myriad totality were silent, save for Kāśyapa, whose face cracked in a faint smile. The Lord spoke.
吾有正法眼藏涅槃妙心實相無相微妙法門不立文字教外別傳付囑摩訶迦葉。
I have the treasure of the true dharma eye, I have nirvāṇa as wondrous citta, I know signless dharmatā, the subtle dharma-gate, which is not standing on written word, which is external to scriptures, which is a special dispensation, which is entrusted to Mahākāśyapa.

नस्वातोनापिपरतोनद्वाभ्यांनाप्यहेतुतः

binocular
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Re: Joke!!! 2.0

Post by binocular » Fri Sep 01, 2017 2:28 pm

In the time of the Buddha, bathing was done in a river, a bathing tank, a sauna, or a
showering place. Instead of soap, people used an unscented powder called chunam,
which was kneaded with water into a dough-like paste. Bhikkhus are explicitly allowed
to use powdered dung, clay, or dye-dregs; according to the Commentary, ordinary
chunam would come under “dye-dregs.” A bhikkhu with an itching rash, a small boil,
or a running sore, or whose body smells bad (in the words of the Commentary, “with a
body odor like that of a horse”) may use scented fragrant powders.


Thanissaro Bhikkhu, The Buddhist Monastic Code
Every person we save is one less zombie to fight. -- World War Z

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