It's very likely, that every man thinks in the same way. I tell the full story.aflatun wrote:
This doesn't make you mad, its entirely normal. In fact if this wasn't your natural (untrained)l reaction I would say something is very wrong
Sorry if I missed it, is there a reason you're not pursuing a partner?
My mental problems started in my childhood. My mother often blamed me, that I am the root cause of all her suffering. She said that I should't have born. I grown up without a father, he denied that I am his son. The continuos blaming caused me feeling guilty. I feel guilt when I have desires, or make some error. I even think I deserve punishment for being alive. My mother is always anxious, so I have a general anxiety. I had a girlfriend, and someone loved me for the first time.
I searched for a mental heath professional, and he gave me medicine. These pills had a side-effect, so I lost interest in woman, I was chemically sterilized for 5 years. The doctor doesn't give me this medicine this year, and the side-effect slowly wears off. I have desires again, but I feel ashamed and guilty. I have no self-confidence, I'm very shy. That's why I can't communicate with woman.