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The disadvantage of forums

Posted: Wed May 07, 2014 11:25 am
by Stiphan
Forums are a great way to learn and offer the advantage of being anonymous, and also allow communication between persons and the forging of relationships huge distances away.

However, a person may be kindly always, yet, due to the lack of visibility of body language, he may well be interpreted as being offensive - there are such cases. Smilies may be helpful but not completely.

Re: The disadvantage of forums

Posted: Wed May 07, 2014 12:43 pm
by waterchan
And then there's the advantages of anonymity. Some of us are big, scary and ugly in real life. I can't have a friendly open debate with some women without them shutting down. Forums provide that layer of impersonality that allow me to discuss without resorting to euphemisms all the time.

Re: The disadvantage of forums

Posted: Wed May 07, 2014 9:07 pm
by BlackBird
I definitely sympathise with what you're saying Stephen, and goodness knows anyone (such as yourself) who's been around since the days of the big ol' grey forum has probably seen all the positives and negatives forums have to offer. It is natural for beings to 'fill in the gaps' where there is a vacuum - It's our old friend 'assumption', and quite often assumptions are biased based upon a beings past (especially their more recent) experiences. Thus it is very difficult for people to be entirely objective, and I have found that it always helps for one to categorically state one's intent so as to avoid confusion. Nevertheless, forums - like life - Have their fair share of assholes, and perhaps we are liable to behave that way at times, especially when ideas and views we hold dear come under fire and are challenged.

I left here quite a while back because I my liability towards passion when I saw people posting what I felt were wrong views became a stumbling block in my practice. Now I am at a stage that others views don't affect me, or my practice and so forums now have enough value to warrant some time. To be blunt: This life is precious, as is one's time, and one has to always ask oneself whether what one is doing is the best use of one's time, and if not - Modify it. That's being honest with oneself.

metta
Jack

Re: The disadvantage of forums

Posted: Thu May 08, 2014 9:20 am
by Stiphan
I value your views, Jack. Thank you for sharing them.

Re: The disadvantage of forums

Posted: Fri May 09, 2014 4:37 pm
by ArkA
Stephen K, if you have a "learning attitude" with a calm mind in both so-called positive and in so-called negative, then you can easily learn from anything and improve well in the Eightfold Path. I used "so-called", because some times what we perceive is not the reality. It's like a person can smile to us, it may be with a sincere thought or perhaps a deceptive thought.

Sometimes people shun the negative so much they become escapists or like castrated animals, which is not conducive because world -- including monasteries -- always has both. They say arahants can live happily anywhere because they are unshaken in so-called positive and also in so-called negative.

May you fare well on the Path! :)

Re: The disadvantage of forums

Posted: Fri May 09, 2014 7:39 pm
by Stiphan
ArkA wrote: May you fare well on the Path! :)
Thank you ArkA, same to you! :)

Re: The disadvantage of forums

Posted: Sun May 11, 2014 7:46 am
by Stiphan
The point I was trying to make was that we should always assume good faith from, and give the benefit of the doubt to, every poster. A post may seem very rude, yet the poster may have said it with utter kindness. We should not judge a post at face value, and assume the poster was rude just because he didn't put a smiley at the end.

In the suttas we can sometimes encounter the Buddha "criticising" a monk by "You misguided man..." - should we assume that that was an instance of ill will or harsh speech? I'm sure the Buddha said it with utmost kindness, gentleness and compassion, but by reading a sutta like this we can come up with the wrong impression because we didn't hear him say it with our ears.

If the Buddha can be misinterpreted what can one say about us posters on a forum.

Re: The disadvantage of forums

Posted: Sun May 11, 2014 10:58 am
by TheNoBSBuddhist
We are lucky to have smileys.

;)


:namaste: