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Feeling Unsafe

Posted: Fri Mar 14, 2014 4:16 am
by sattva
I am probably 75% sure that this is only in my mind, but I am feeling a lot of fear about my move to a new place this weekend. Part of it may have to do with the fact that I have lived most of my life with other people and now I will be living alone. Add to that the facts that I am 60, with multiple health problems, including some mobility problems. I was once physically quite strong and now I couldn't fight my way out of a paper bag. I am not very happy about the location of the move but have no where else to go right now. I guess what I am feeling is very vulnerable and scared. Besides doing metta, which Buddha recommended for fear, does anyone else know of any other practices, chants, visualizations, etc., that could help me during this transition? My gut is saying run for the hills.

Re: Feeling Unsafe

Posted: Fri Mar 14, 2014 4:26 am
by cooran
Hello sattva,

Metta is good, but so are some other ways:

https://www.psychology.org.au/publicati ... nxiety/#s6

With metta,
Chris

Re: Feeling Unsafe

Posted: Fri Mar 14, 2014 4:47 am
by Kusala
sattva wrote:I am probably 75% sure that this is only in my mind, but I am feeling a lot of fear about my move to a new place this weekend. Part of it may have to do with the fact that I have lived most of my life with other people and now I will be living alone. Add to that the facts that I am 60, with multiple health problems, including some mobility problems. I was once physically quite strong and now I couldn't fight my way out of a paper bag. I am not very happy about the location of the move but have no where else to go right now. I guess what I am feeling is very vulnerable and scared. Besides doing metta, which Buddha recommended for fear, does anyone else know of any other practices, chants, visualizations, etc., that could help me during this transition? My gut is saying run for the hills.
These Dhamma talks may help... http://www.audiodharma.org/talks/?search=fear

Re: Feeling Unsafe

Posted: Fri Mar 14, 2014 5:26 am
by sattva
cooran wrote:Hello sattva,

Metta is good, but so are some other ways:

https://www.psychology.org.au/publicati ... nxiety/#s6

With metta,
Chris
Thanks, Chris!

Re: Feeling Unsafe

Posted: Fri Mar 14, 2014 5:28 am
by sattva
Kusala wrote:
sattva wrote:I am probably 75% sure that this is only in my mind, but I am feeling a lot of fear about my move to a new place this weekend. Part of it may have to do with the fact that I have lived most of my life with other people and now I will be living alone. Add to that the facts that I am 60, with multiple health problems, including some mobility problems. I was once physically quite strong and now I couldn't fight my way out of a paper bag. I am not very happy about the location of the move but have no where else to go right now. I guess what I am feeling is very vulnerable and scared. Besides doing metta, which Buddha recommended for fear, does anyone else know of any other practices, chants, visualizations, etc., that could help me during this transition? My gut is saying run for the hills.
These Dhamma talks may help... http://www.audiodharma.org/talks/?search=fear
Thanks, Kusala, ---what an impressive amount of talks on the subject!

Re: Feeling Unsafe

Posted: Fri Mar 14, 2014 5:39 am
by plwk
Try this and this

Re: Feeling Unsafe

Posted: Fri Mar 14, 2014 6:53 am
by sattva
plwk wrote:Try this and this
Thanks plwk! If I could take Sammy with me, I would probably feel better :D

Re: Feeling Unsafe

Posted: Fri Mar 14, 2014 7:33 am
by cooran
What is going to happen to Sammy? Is he going to be rehoused?

With metta,
Chris

Re: Feeling Unsafe

Posted: Fri Mar 14, 2014 10:19 am
by plwk
:shock: What a gorgeous Sammy :thumbsup:
Yeah, what's going to happen to Sammy?

Re: Feeling Unsafe

Posted: Fri Mar 14, 2014 12:05 pm
by Anagarika
Sattva:

Already there are excellent suggestions to you. One thought I had was to practice a meditation on gratitude. A neuroscientist with a Buddhist approach has suggested that we can reset our anxiety and depression "setpoints" by concentrating on what in our life we can be grateful for. Even in difficult circumstances, we can meditate on the fact that we live in a country not at war, we have clean water and food to consume, we have someone in our lives that cares for us, we have a roof over our heads. We meditate on the idea that for millions of people, the above is not true; others exist that suffer from hunger, misery, and homelessness. See if there are threads of hope that you can tease out of your situation.

I also recall that HHDL and Dr. Howard Cutler wrote a book wherein Dr. Cutler advises that we all have contacts with community. He stated that one outside group involvement or hobby can elevate mood, and extend our lives. Two activities or groups can double this life extension. The idea is that along with his treatment of patients for anxiety and depression with therapy and medication, he had them as part of their treatment connect with people, join groups, develop hobbies. He claims that this interaction made a huge difference. Perhaps, as you venture forth to living alone, you can develop skills that will connect you with others, even with mobility issues.

Re: Feeling Unsafe

Posted: Fri Mar 14, 2014 1:53 pm
by Aloka
Hi sattva,

This short article from Ajahn Amaro "Inviting Fear" might be helpful.

http://www.tricycle.com/practice/inviting-fear

I hope things go well for you.

With metta,

Aloka :hug:

Re: Feeling Unsafe

Posted: Fri Mar 14, 2014 8:40 pm
by Kasina
cooran wrote:Hello sattva,

Metta is good, but so are some other ways:

https://www.psychology.org.au/publicati ... nxiety/#s6

With metta,
Chris
Kusala wrote:These Dhamma talks may help... http://www.audiodharma.org/talks/?search=fear
Both these posts helped me, good site Kusala.

:anjali:

Re: Feeling Unsafe

Posted: Sat Mar 15, 2014 4:46 am
by sattva
cooran wrote:What is going to happen to Sammy? Is he going to be rehoused?

With metta,
Chris
Sammy is going to be fine! Thanks for asking Chis and plwk. I am the one leaving. He will be staying right here with his mother (my niece), her new husband, and my fairly newly retired sister. Sammy along with Cane gets lots of love and attention which is right up his alley. He is such a friendly, affectionate, and mischievous cat! It would be hard not to love him. My bedroom will hopefully become a nursery before the year has ended, which is why I am leaving. Cane is more standoffish, but we get along okay. There are some people he doesn't take too at all, but he is a pretty cat. They are both really big cats!













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Re: Feeling Unsafe

Posted: Sat Mar 15, 2014 4:57 am
by sattva
BuddhaSoup wrote:Sattva:

Already there are excellent suggestions to you. One thought I had was to practice a meditation on gratitude. (sattva: An excellent idea and one every so often my teacher reminds me of!) A neuroscientist with a Buddhist approach has suggested that we can reset our anxiety and depression "setpoints" by concentrating on what in our life we can be grateful for. Even in difficult circumstances, we can meditate on the fact that we live in a country not at war, we have clean water and food to consume, we have someone in our lives that cares for us, we have a roof over our heads. We meditate on the idea that for millions of people, the above is not true; others exist that suffer from hunger, misery, and homelessness. See if there are threads of hope that you can tease out of your situation.

I also recall that HHDL and Dr. Howard Cutler wrote a book wherein Dr. Cutler advises that we all have contacts with community. He stated that one outside group involvement or hobby can elevate mood, and extend our lives. Two activities or groups can double this life extension. The idea is that along with his treatment of patients for anxiety and depression with therapy and medication, he had them as part of their treatment connect with people, join groups, develop hobbies. He claims that this interaction made a huge difference. (sattva: I really like this idea. Thanks!) Perhaps, as you venture forth to living alone, you can develop skills that will connect you with others, even with mobility issues.
:goodpost:

Re: Feeling Unsafe

Posted: Sat Mar 15, 2014 4:59 am
by sattva
Aloka wrote:Hi sattva,

This short article from Ajahn Amaro "Inviting Fear" might be helpful.

http://www.tricycle.com/practice/inviting-fear

I hope things go well for you.

With metta,

Aloka :hug:
Thanks! :hug: