Don't like to meditate

General discussion of issues related to Theravada Meditation, e.g. meditation postures, developing a regular sitting practice, skillfully relating to difficulties and hindrances, etc.

Re: Don't like to meditate

Postby BlackBird » Wed May 15, 2013 1:03 am

Ben wrote:
plwk wrote:Spot on Ben. I think there was once I spotted an Ajahn Chah quote...
If you like to meditate, then meditate. If you don't like to meditate, then meditate.


Exactly, plwk.
In my humble experience meditation is frequently less than a pleasant experience. But unless one finds the motivation within oneself to engage with and maintain the practice, then it isn't going to happen.
My advice to Digity may seem insensitive but sometimes the best way to overcome obstacles is to stop thinking about it and engage.
kind regards,

Ben


Not insensitive, although a clarification always settles any doubts. Just the right cup of tea for the job imo.
"For a disciple who has conviction in the Teacher's message & lives to penetrate it, what accords with the Dhamma is this:
'The Blessed One is the Teacher, I am a disciple. He is the one who knows, not I." - MN. 70 Kitagiri Sutta
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Re: Don't like to meditate

Postby Kamran » Wed May 15, 2013 1:45 am

Why not try listening to some pep-talks while focusing on your breath ? The vast majority Thai forest talks are basically pep talks designed to motivate you to meditate.

Thanissaro Bikhu's 15 min talks can be very inspiring.

He covers the problem you are having, and most others you'll encounter at www.dhammatalks.org
When this concentration is thus developed, thus well developed by you, then wherever you go, you will go in comfort. Wherever you stand, you will stand in comfort. Wherever you sit, you will sit in comfort. Wherever you lie down, you will lie down in comfort.
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Re: Don't like to meditate

Postby binocular » Wed May 15, 2013 7:29 am

Dan74 wrote:Some people are way too restless most of the time to settle on a cushion, I think.


Yes. Which is why it is sometimes advised that a person first develop a physical skill, like sewing or some other craft or to play a musical instrument. To master a physical skill like that requires a considerable amount of mental and practical skills that are needed in meditation too, but it is closer to our usual experience than meditating on the breath or other forms of meditation. Which is how mastering a physical skill can be a good preparation for meditation.


Digity wrote:I'm very restless to begin with. I absolutely hate my general agitated feeling I have, but I'm someone whose had his share of anxiety problems in his life. I sometimes don't feel cut out for meditation...and there I go with excuses again!

Maybe they're not excuses.
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Re: Don't like to meditate

Postby Crazy cloud » Wed May 15, 2013 8:15 am

In my own prep for meditation - the instinctive feeling of doing somthing bad by sitting and doing nothing, was a considerable obstacle. My childhood programming (thanks parents and their parents ... :clap: ) "told" me that I had no right to just sit there ... So I just had to let go of that bad software

I love my lazy bones ... :mrgreen:
your name Mori means forest like the infinite fresh green distances of your blindness
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Re: Don't like to meditate

Postby Digity » Wed May 15, 2013 10:33 am

binocular wrote:
Digity wrote:I'm very restless to begin with. I absolutely hate my general agitated feeling I have, but I'm someone whose had his share of anxiety problems in his life. I sometimes don't feel cut out for meditation...and there I go with excuses again!

Maybe they're not excuses.

Since I posted this way back in September I've become a regular meditator. I got over my desire to avoid meditation by just doing it. If anything, now I don't feel happy if I miss a sitting.
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Re: Don't like to meditate

Postby manas » Wed May 15, 2013 8:06 pm

Digity wrote:
binocular wrote:
Digity wrote:I'm very restless to begin with. I absolutely hate my general agitated feeling I have, but I'm someone whose had his share of anxiety problems in his life. I sometimes don't feel cut out for meditation...and there I go with excuses again!

Maybe they're not excuses.

Since I posted this way back in September I've become a regular meditator. I got over my desire to avoid meditation by just doing it. If anything, now I don't feel happy if I miss a sitting.


Well done Digity!

Keep at it man.

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Re: Don't like to meditate

Postby marc108 » Thu May 16, 2013 12:27 am

great advice in this thread!
"It's easy for us to connect with what's wrong with us... and not so easy to feel into, or to allow us, to connect with what's right and what's good in us."
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Re: Don't like to meditate

Postby Helyron » Thu May 16, 2013 4:13 pm

Try different meditation types (attentiveness ...), different times, different clothes, different poses and if it you still do not like it, let it be. But there are so many different kinds of meditation that I could not believe that. For example walking meditation. ;)
Start free-thinking, start living.
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Re: Don't like to meditate

Postby kmath » Sat May 18, 2013 4:44 am

mikenz66 wrote:
Dan74 wrote:Some people are way too restless most of the time to settle on a cushion, I think. Sometimes going for a jog first may help, or settling down with a hot cuppa. For others walking meditation feels more natural.

I agree, I always try to start with walking, unless it's just not practical (lack of room, sitting with a group that doesn't like walking :tongue:, ...). In my experience it's much easier to build up some initial mindfulness and concentration walking than sitting.

:anjali:
Mike


Trying walking meditation is a great idea. Even the forest masters spent hours everyday on their walking path. And speaking personally, I have gone long periods of time where walking was my main practice. Whatever works!

But in my humble opinion, try not to force yourself too much. Eventually you may burn out and give up your practice completely. Be gentle!

Remember, it's eightfold path, so meditation is only one part.

:anjali:
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Re: Don't like to meditate

Postby 2600htz » Sat May 18, 2013 2:58 pm

Hihi:

My advice, do not meditate! haha, take some time off.
Meditation its supposed to be a fun thing, what u are doing is having dislike (craving) to something, and u are pushing it trying to change that aversion into something else. And that will cause a lot of tightness until u finally say ok cant take it anymore and u will change your pattern.
If u take some time off u will begin to see how that pushing was causing tightness, and thats the actual meditation!, seeing how u went from a unwholesome state into a wholesome, and that will provide u with interest into how mind works and meditation in general.

Take care.
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Re: Don't like to meditate

Postby JSearch » Wed Jun 05, 2013 12:35 am

Sorry I've been meaning to post for a while but have been busy as well as a little ill.

2600htz wrote:Hihi:

My advice, do not meditate! haha, take some time off.
Meditation its supposed to be a fun thing, what u are doing is having dislike (craving) to something, and u are pushing it trying to change that aversion into something else. And that will cause a lot of tightness until u finally say ok cant take it anymore and u will change your pattern.
If u take some time off u will begin to see how that pushing was causing tightness, and thats the actual meditation!, seeing how u went from a unwholesome state into a wholesome, and that will provide u with interest into how mind works and meditation in general.

Take care.


Thanks for this, I was actually given this advice before by a Buddhist several years ago, my only trouble then is I end up forget everything about meditation, mental relaxation etc. and falling asleep every time.

Whats worse when I just try to relax thoughts fly in about meditation itself, or "trying to meditate", it's like a catch 22.

I distinctly remember after the original experience telling myself that I needed to find a place of mental rest and peace everyday, but I did not call it meditation. Ever since I've read some literature and "meditation" it's as if I've armed my mind against me, it's just like when I was a teenager trying to meditate but worse.

So the trouble now is I can't even try to find a place of mental rest and peace as meditation thoughts come flying in!
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Re: Don't like to meditate

Postby Zenainder » Thu Jun 06, 2013 7:24 pm

JSearch wrote:Sorry I've been meaning to post for a while but have been busy as well as a little ill.

2600htz wrote:Hihi:

My advice, do not meditate! haha, take some time off.
Meditation its supposed to be a fun thing, what u are doing is having dislike (craving) to something, and u are pushing it trying to change that aversion into something else. And that will cause a lot of tightness until u finally say ok cant take it anymore and u will change your pattern.
If u take some time off u will begin to see how that pushing was causing tightness, and thats the actual meditation!, seeing how u went from a unwholesome state into a wholesome, and that will provide u with interest into how mind works and meditation in general.

Take care.


Thanks for this, I was actually given this advice before by a Buddhist several years ago, my only trouble then is I end up forget everything about meditation, mental relaxation etc. and falling asleep every time.

Whats worse when I just try to relax thoughts fly in about meditation itself, or "trying to meditate", it's like a catch 22.

I distinctly remember after the original experience telling myself that I needed to find a place of mental rest and peace everyday, but I did not call it meditation. Ever since I've read some literature and "meditation" it's as if I've armed my mind against me, it's just like when I was a teenager trying to meditate but worse.

So the trouble now is I can't even try to find a place of mental rest and peace as meditation thoughts come flying in!


Awareness of your relative state and its thoughts is considered progress. Do not attempt thoughtlessness. Meditation is not about chasing thoughts out of your mind, but letting it naturally settle. Similarily to the way water settles and the contaminates separate themselves from the water's, revealing its natural clarity. Thought engagement, be it via aversion or preference, only stirs the pot. "Note" your thoughts as they freely come and go and return your attention to the breath. When you first practice it will seem like a tidal wave of thoughts, which is your mind, let it be and go with its flow.

Do not forget that ultimately the goal is nothing / emptiness.
If the words "I", "me", or "you" are used, they are for the use of convenience related purposes. None of these exist, of course. ;)
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