Relationships suttas

Exploring Theravāda's connections to other paths - what can we learn from other traditions, religions and philosophies?
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Saoshun
Posts: 282
Joined: Sat Nov 29, 2014 3:59 pm

Relationships suttas

Post by Saoshun »

There are any relationships suttas who give insight into lay people relationships? I know there is sutta for childrens to treat mother and father well but what about relationships in buddhist cannon?
Remember… the Buddha had said that everyone living in this world is crazy, by the phrase, “Sabbē prutajjana ummattakā”; excluding the Arahants, everyone else is crazy. Would you get angry if a mad person scolds? Do we get angry for a crazy thing done by a crazy person? Just think about it! :candle:
culaavuso
Posts: 1363
Joined: Sat Jan 11, 2014 8:27 pm

Re: Relationships suttas

Post by culaavuso »

DN 31 discusses conduct between a husband and wife:
DN 31: Sīgālovāda Sutta wrote: In five ways, young householder, should a wife as the West be ministered to by a husband:

(i) by being courteous to her,
(ii) by not despising her,
(iii) by being faithful to her,
(iv) by handing over authority to her,
(v) by providing her with adornments.

The wife thus ministered to as the West by her husband shows her compassion to her husband in five ways:

(i) she performs her duties well,
(ii) she is hospitable to relations and attendants
(iii) she is faithful,
(iv) she protects what he brings,
(v) she is skilled and industrious in discharging her duties.
In these five ways does the wife show her compassion to her husband who ministers to her as the West. Thus is the West covered by him and made safe and secure.
There is also AN 4.55:
AN 4.55: Samajīvī Sutta wrote: If both husband & wife want to see one another not only in the present life but also in the life to come, they should be in tune [with each other] in conviction, in tune in virtue, in tune in generosity, and in tune in discernment. Then they will see one another not only in the present life but also in the life to come.

Husband & wife, both of them
having conviction,
being responsive,
being restrained,
living by the Dhamma,
addressing each other
with loving words:
they benefit in manifold ways.
To them comes bliss.
Their enemies are dejected
when both are in tune in virtue.
Having followed the Dhamma here in this world,
both in tune in precepts & practices,
they delight in the world of the devas,
enjoying the pleasures they desire.
And AN 7.63:
[url=http://suttacentral.net/an7.63]AN 7.63: Sattabhariyā Sutta[/url] ([url=http://www.wisdompubs.org/book/numerical-discourses-buddha]NDB[/url]) wrote: With hateful mind, devoid of sympathy, lusting for others, despising her husband, she seeks to kill the one who bought her with wealth: a wife like this is called a wife and a killer.

When the woman's husband acquires wealth by toiling at a craft, trade, or farming, she tries to steal it, even if [he earns] but little: a wife like this is called a wife and a thief.

The lazy glutton, unwilling to work, harsh, fierce, rough in speech, a woman who dominates her own supporters: a wife like this is called a wife and a tyrant.

One always benevolent and sympathetic, who guards her husband as a mother her son, who protects the wealth he earns: a wife like this is called a wife and a mother.

She who holds her husband in high regard as younger sister her elder brother, conscientious, following her husband's will: a wife like this is called a wife and a sister.

One who rejoices when she sees her husband as if seeing a friend after a long absence; well raised, virtuous, devoted to her husband: a wife like this is called a wife and a friend.

One who remains patient and calm, when threatened with violence by the rod, who tolerates her husband with a mind free of hate, patient, submissive to her husband's will: a wife like this is called a wife and a slave.

The types of wives here called a killer, a thief, a tyrant, immoral, harsh, disrespectful, with the body's breakup go to hell.

But the types of wives here called mother, sister, friend, and slave, firm in virtue, long restrained, with the body's breakup go to heaven.
Saoshun
Posts: 282
Joined: Sat Nov 29, 2014 3:59 pm

Re: Relationships suttas

Post by Saoshun »

Thank you.
Remember… the Buddha had said that everyone living in this world is crazy, by the phrase, “Sabbē prutajjana ummattakā”; excluding the Arahants, everyone else is crazy. Would you get angry if a mad person scolds? Do we get angry for a crazy thing done by a crazy person? Just think about it! :candle:
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Jetavan
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Re: Relationships suttas

Post by Jetavan »

Bhikkhu Basnagoda Rahula's book, The Buddha's Teachings on Prosperity: At Home, at Work, in the World, is also a good source on relationship suttas.
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